The Active Participant

"Engage yourself fully in the details of living, and with each day you add value to your life that cannot be taken away. Be an active, enthusiastic participant in this day, and you'll come away from it with real, lasting treasure." -- Ralph Marston

Ever have days when you wonder where the hell time went and/or what you've done with your life? Of course you have; we all have. I have gaps in my life which I can't and don't recall and there have been moments where I wonder who was at the wheel. I realize now that I relinquished control to the wrong things and sometimes the wrong people. That revelation is startling because it shows that we're all so easily misled, misguided, and misunderstood when we aren't clear about what our intentions are for ourselves or for/with others. So, often when we realize we've been back seat drivers in our cars of life, and those we let at the wheel were in some ways drunk drivers. Granted, there are times when we need to relinquish control and allow others to lead while we're trying to figure things out, but there does come a time when we have to stop and take control. We can't and shouldn't allow ourselves to squander our lives away.

In speaking with lil sis on Sunday, she told me of her soon to be 26 year old friend who is currently pregnant with her 4th child. Said girl has only a high school education, a part time job, an unemployed husband, and her 3rd child has cerebal palsy; a bit much for a girl I'd say. Lil sis and I discussed how this girl has no prospects of a better life, probably will not be able to provide a better life for her children, and basically will only have children to show for her existence. Though I partly wanted to feel bad for the girl, I found that I couldn't. She has chosen the life she currently has and her complains are pretty warrantless as she's made the proverbial bed she's laying in. We predict that years from now, she'll look back and wonder where it all went and what does she have to show for herself. As they say, "with age comes wisdom", so this we're hoping that she'll stop having kids and try to do what she can with what she has for herself and her family. We also hope that her husband will step up to the plate and get a job.

Back to my initial and basic point though...We all need to be active participants in our lives. We can't and shouldn't sit around complacent and placing blame on why we're in the predicaments we're in. It's all so easy to say it's society's fault for this or that; blame our parents; blame our education (sometimes lack thereof); we simply need to start being active. Get off our asses and do something; anything is better than nothing. Look beyond material things to define you. Look beyond whether you're the perfect height, size, or weight. Find wealth in knowledge, integrity, and excelling at whatever it is you're good out. Lead; however, follow when necessary. There are so many ways to be active...what's yours?