06 June 2007

Just how "hood" are you?

The Jewel's light hasn't been shining so bright for the past few days and i've been struggling with some things that i initially wasn't sure how to handle. i prayed on the things that were affecting me and did what i know is the right thing to do, which is to let go and let God. so, now that i've done that, i feel it's time for me to let the Jewel sparkle again and i thought this funny post would be a good start for it. Enjoy!

GET A PENCIL AND PAPER BEFORE YOU START THIS JUST
You've ever used an album cover (album would be for the “grown folk" of this blog…lol) for a dustpan. (5 points)

If you've ever run a race barefoot in the middle of the street. (10 points)

You had a candy lady in your neighborhood. (5 + 5 extra points if your house was the candy lady)

If you ever had to pick your own switch or belt. (3 points for each)

If you have ever had to walk to school or walked home from school. (2 points)

If you have ever used dishwashing liquid for bubble bath. (5 points)

If you ever mixed Kool-Aid one glass at a time because you got tired of other people drinking up the Kool-Aid you just made. (5 points)

If you have ever played any of the following games: hide and go seek, freeze, tag, Momma may I? or red light/green light. (2 points each)

If your neighborhood had an ice cream man. (2 points + 2 if he rang a bell)

If you refer to "Now and Later" candies as "Nighladers". (5 points)

If you've ever run from the police on foot. (5 points + 5 if you got away)

If you've ever had reusable bacon grease in a container on your stove. (5 points + 15 if you still do it)

The batteries in your remote control ever been held in by a piece of tape. (5 points)

If you have ever worn any of the following fragrances Brute, Hai-Karate, Jean Nate, Old Spice, Chloe, English Leather, Stetson, Charlie, or Faberge. (1 point each):

You've ever used Tussy Deodorant. (5 points)

You've never been to the dentist. (15 points)

If you have a friend or family member whose nickname is one word said twice: dee-dee, fee-fee, man-man, Kay-Kay, lee-lee, ree-ree, ray-ray, nay-nay, tee-tee etc. (10 points)

You have ever paged yourself for any reason. (3 points)

You've ever worn house shoes outside of the house. (2 points) ***had to correct this one cause Xae made a very necessary correction...You've ever worn house shoes outside of the house. (20 points +5 if you are male, +25 if you went to the mall) UGH!!!!

You add "ED" or "T" to the end of words already in the past tense (e.g. Tooked, Light-Skinneded, kilt, ruint, etc.) (5 points)

You use 'n'em to describe a certain group of people (for example Craig'n'em or Momma 'n'em). (5 points)

You've ever driven on a donut more than 2 weeks after your flat. (5 points)

You have ever slept in a chair to avoid messing up your hair. (10 points)

You've ever left a social gathering with a plate. (2 points)

You can't hold a glass because of the length of your nails. (5 points)

The gold teeth in your mouth spell words. (10 points)

You don't have your own place but your child has a leather coat and a pair of Jordan 's. (15 points)

You constantly hit *69 and ask, "Did you just call here?" (10 points)

You think Tupac is still alive. (20 points)

If you are going to have to use a calculator to add your points. (25 points)

Now the totals...
0 - 50 points - I guess you were raised in the suburbs

51 - 75 points - A bonafide ex-hood rat

76 - 150 points - Spent a little time in the projects, huh?

150 points or more - Still there, huh?

13 comments:

Believer said...

Letting go and letting God is the best.

Girl…this post goes down in history! It's so true, but funny. It's nice to know that those of us raised poor can laugh about it now. I scored only a 25, but could relate. Thanks for making me laugh!

Ms.Honey said...

The only way to make it is to let go and let God..cause things always get worse when we try to work them out...

Man this was too funny I'm 101% hood and no I didn't spend a lil time in the projects unless you count ages 1 to 2 LOL

Anonymous said...

Girl this list is a HOOT! How come I'm over 150? I have 4 relatives Dee-Dee, Dee-Dee, Dee-Dee, Kay-Kay and T-T.

I gotta go put that used bacon grease in the skillet but I wanted to give some sisterly advice...keep seeking God's answer to your problems. Prove Him and see.

Debo Blue

Xave said...

Only scored 19 but I want to submit a small correcttion:

"You've ever worn house shoes outside of the house. (2 points)"

This should be:
You've ever worn house shoes outside of the house. (20 points +5 if you are male, +25 if you went to the mall) UGH!!!!

Blu Jewel said...

Rose - thanks for the continued inspiration. glad the post made you laugh and that you could get in on the rating scale

honey - you aint never lied. thanks for the kind words. 101 huh? interesting.

debo - 150? damn lady sup like that? lol. your guidance means a lot.

I scored a 68 and I've never lived a day in the hood. WTF? i guess life in the burbs really isn't that much different.

Blu Jewel said...

zay - your comment must have come in while i was commenting. OMG! i had to hold my mouth to stop me from screaming laughing when i read your comment. and YES, you're right about that.

BZ said...

Yes! Let go and let God! I have some crazy financial crap going on that is going to force me to forego FL in a couple weeks. But I know I'ma be ok, cuz God is gonna work-it-out!


FYI: Exactly 100 points. LMAO!

T.a.c.D said...

take your time big sis...

we all know that sometimes we go through things that we don't understand, or have feelings we can't get under control, but just keep it all in prayer...in prayer...GOD will provide

in the other news
ok so we all know i HATE the whole "you are so ghetto" see:
http://tclarkegolden.blogspot.com/2007/05/in-ghetto.html

however, i decided to take this just for the hell of it...and i be dagged on if I didn't score 112 points!!!! off the hook

layne bowden said...

AHAHAHAHAHA...

you are SO wrong for this!! or maybe i'm the one who's wrong since i scored an 85!! (lmao)

wow.

anyhoo... ummm... so, i'm glad to see you're letting the jewel sparkle again!! i love it! and i love you!!

peace...

Blu Jewel said...

bz - thanks hun...i know u got me! zackly 100? was that with or without the calculator? *lol*

t.c - thanks for the kind words and encouragment. it's good to know that you have my back. i read your post on "ghetto" and the fact that you scored 112 is hilarious.

the funny thing is that what is perceived to be "hood" or "ghetto" is pretty universal.

Believer said...

I couldn't resist doing a blogthing today (Friday). Rapping might be my new gig. Just playin'! *wink*

jendayi said...

HA!!!! I cracked out laughing at this. I'm not going to add my points because I didn't do the majority of things on the list, but you surely brought up stuff I forgot about! This was funny Blu! Thanks for making me laugh.

B.m.W said...

I was not raised in the burbs...but I live there now and we ain't goin back. Ha Ha