31 May 2007
Maybe...
Maybe . . .
we were supposed to meet the wrong people before meeting the right one so
that, when we finally meet the right person, we will know how to be
grateful for that gift.
Maybe . . .
when the door of happiness closes, another opens; but, often times, we
look so long at the closed door that we don't even see the new one which
has been opened for us.
Maybe . . .
it is true that we don't know what we have until we lose it, so we should
take more time to appreciate it while it's ours.
Maybe . . .
the happiest of people don't necessarily have the best of everything; they
just make the most of everything that comes along their way.
Maybe . . .
the brightest future will always be based on a forgotten past; after all,
you can't go on successfully in life until you let go of your past
mistakes, failures and heartaches.
Maybe . . .
you should dream what you want to dream; go where you want to go, be what
you want to be, because you have only one life and one chance to do all
the things you dream of, and want to do.
Maybe . . .
there are moments in life when you miss someone -- a parent, a spouse, a
friend, a child -- so much that you just want to pick them from your
dreams and hug them for real, so that once they are around you appreciate
them more.
Maybe . . .
the best kind of friend is the kind you can sit on a porch and swing with,
never say a word, and then walk away feeling like it was the best
conversation you've ever had.
Maybe . .
you should always try to put yourself in others' shoes. If you feel that
something could hurt you, it probably will hurt the other person, too.
Maybe . .
you should do something nice for someone every single day, even if it is
simply to leave them alone.
Maybe . .
giving someone all your love is never an assurance that they will love you
back. Don't expect love in return; just wait for it to grow in their
heart; but, if it doesn't, be content that it grew in yours.
Maybe . . .
happiness waits for all those who cry, all those who hurt, all those who
have searched, and all those who have tried, for only they can appreciate
the importance of all the people who have touched their lives.
Maybe . . .
you shouldn't go for looks; they can deceive; don't go for wealth; even
that fades away. Go for someone who makes you smile, because it takes only
a smile to make a dark day seem bright. Find the one that makes your heart
smile.
Maybe . .
you should hope for enough happiness to make you sweet, enough trials to
make you strong, enough sorrow to keep you human, and enough hope to make
you happy.
Definitely...
30 May 2007
ThOuGhTs FrOm ThE eDgE
Why does the sound of this man at the job’s power wheelchair scare me each time he rides by? *shaking*
Why can’t this damn woman on the other side of my cube realize that her body spray stinks? I could care less that she’s trying to mask the cigarette smell, I don’t need an effin migraine each time she sprays that crap.
I’m sick to death of people making eye contact and not speaking. Just don’t effin look at me then dammit! *ugh*
WTF is wrong with folk not knowing how to say, “excuse me?” before they start a conversation with you while your back is turned?
I so damn wish I could smack stank off the lady who uses the bathroom and doesn’t wash her hands afterward. Just effin nasty!
Why does the geek squad that sits across from me talk so damn loud to each other when they’re like 3 feet apart? *smh*
WTF is wrong with public offices not answering they’re %)P#*%&# phones? Aren’t they supposed to have a damn recording if they’re not available? *trying not to scream*
I wish I still had an office with a door so I would have to put up with the idle banter that sometimes happens around me.
I need a side hustle so I can keep “Bill” out my damn life so I can actually have something out of my paychecks. *tossin lint out of my pocket*
I’m starting to hate online automatic withdrawal payments. *so much for technology*
Why do people give you partial information and expect you to figure out what the hell they’re talking about? *glazed expression*
I love my job, but why in the hell does detailed work always happen shortly before I’m scheduled to leave?
I seriously need a hooky day, I spend too much of my time working. *wiping tears from eyes*
My review is coming up in a couple months, I better get more than 3% for a raise or imma raise some serious Cain.
The cost of gas is so pissing me off cause I like to drive and cant go places as often as I’d like as a result of it; $55-$57 to fill Big Buddy damn near weekly sucks.
Living near the shore effin sucks cause the traffic is a mutha hubba on the weekends.
WTF is wrong with people who start a conversation with you while you’re on the damn phone?
Why am I looking cute today and in such a damn foul mood?
I better find the strength to tie a knot in this rope cause I’m barely hanging on today.
24 May 2007
let the Rayne pour
for months, weeks, days; leading up to it, she complained and whined that she was "getting old" and "oh, my God, I can't believe i'm gonna be 30". I openly laughed and teased her about it because 30 really isn't old at all. In fact, she could never pass for being her age as she looks like she's still in her early 20's. (READ...12 when she wears a ponytail...lol) So, unless she publically announces her age, who'll be the wiser?
age my friends, is NOTHING BUT A NUMBER! it's not a reflection of yourself nor is it a death sentence. the older you get, the wiser you get. with age comes said wisdom (unless you're just dumber than duck shit...she's far from that!) i digress. anyhoo, she's a smart and talented young woman who works hard, loves her family & real friends, will do just about anything for anyone, and need not worry about being 30.
today's 30, is the new 20 they say...personally, i think it's a little insulting given the way most 20 y/o act, but that's just my opinion. being 30 affords you a certain right and privilege because people will actually take you more seriously, be more inclined to show you the courtesy you deserve regardless, and the doors of opportunity will fly open in your favor. see, i've noticed that everyone spouts off about experience this; experience that and you, for the most part don't really have it until you're in your 30's. a certain maturation has occurred by this time so one should embrace that new milestone with the vitality and drive it deserves.
Rayne, this post is to shout you out for being a great friend. Welcome to the real world. Look forward to all the blessings this new avenue of your life will afford you. Don't worry about the number as it's not who you are, you are who you are. Your ambition and your willingness to be open and receptive will be the catalysts for your success. The woman you are forming into is ready to shine. Excuse my redundancy, but 30 is a beautiful and wonderful time and experience. It's a marker for your development and with open arms, heart, and eyes, you'll see that this chapter of your life will blaze the trail for you.
23 May 2007
Cherry Poppin!
I began ready one blog in particular and was often tickled by it's content and became curious about the person behind it. Not one to quickly want to get to know females (y'all women know what I mean), I struggled with the idea of contacting her over some things she'd written. One evening, I finally mustered up the courage to email her. She graciously accepted my out reach and responded in kind to my email. Over frequent exchanges, I felt my guard come down a little and I shared that I was reluctant to fully let my guard down after what I had previously happened to me. She made a statement that shocked me. "I promise you, I will never let you regret meeting me." I took it with a grain of salt at first thinking, "yeah, that's what they all say at first and then they hit you with the big gun." Well, I must admit, she's not only made me eat crow, but a good helping of humble pie. This woman has become a good source of amusement; a companion; a motivator; an inspiration; a sista in Christ; and most of all and more importantly; she's kept her initial word. So, ms jus.b.fli, I just wanted to thank you for poppin my Getting to Know You Offline Blogger Cherry. We speak via phone, through email, and one day I look forward to meeting her in person. Oh, what a scary. yet fun day that'll be...watch out world! *devilish laugh*
Now, I want to take this even further. Back when all the Blogger Tabloid erupted with the whole faking your own death saga took place, I began to get to know another blogger online through our respective blogs. His spoke often (read...ALL THE TIME...lol) about his lovely girlfriend who lives in Jamaica. I was planning a trip and made inquiries regarding her etc. We took the convo offline to emails and eventually via phone. He was pleasant, polite, and informative and it was a pleasure to get to know another blogger personally. Back in April when I took my trip, we planned to meet at the airport, but with the flight delay I had and circumstances beyond my control, we didn't meet. We did; however, speak and I said, "maybe next time". Well, that next time was a few weeks ago and we did in fact get to meet. Having already known what he looked like I found it funny to see him looking for me. We hugged upon meeting and commenced into a wonderful conversation for the duration of my layover. We spoke about so many things and we mutually announced this was our first Blogger Meet Up. The person I'm referring to is Xavier Pierre of the Lovers Anonymous fame. I'd post a link, but his page is private. I will; however; post an excerpt of his post as it was one of the sweetest things someone has probably ever said about me.
"When my cell-phone went off I was already inside the terminal. Sure enough it was Blu Jewel telling me that she was off the plane and on the concourse near gate H9. I stepped out of the elevator and took 4 steps then heard the voice from over my right shoulder. “Looking for me?” When I turned, I was greeted by a smile of uncommon brightness, immediately familiar even when seen for the first time. We hugged each other warmly and immediately started to talk like two old friends who’ve known each other for years.From reading Blu Jewel and the phone conversations we’ve had, I pretty much knew what to expect and she didn’t disappoint. Understated British sophistication mixed with disarming Jamaican charm is a fascinating combination, but wrap it up in the personality of Blu Jewel and I can just picture a resolute African king on an unyielding mission to find his missing rib.Blu and I talked about everything from relationship pitfalls to parenthood. Of course no conversation with Xavier is complete if Ali’s name isn’t mentioned and Blu was quite indulgent and generous in her attention. But it was never one-sided. I found Blu to be a very open person with a generous heart and a growing commitment to helping others. As she shared I found myself wanting to reassure that special someone that his nomadic journey will be well worth it if his wanderings lead to Blu Jewel.But all too soon it was time to go. Blu’s connecting flight was boarding and I had gone way past my lunch hour. But the 45 minutes we spent chatting in terminal 4 of FLL airport will always be fondly remembered. Godspeed Blu! Be safe until we meet again."
*Sniff* @ the italicized remark he made. How sweet is that?!
I can't forget another blogger with whom I'm anxiously waiting to meet and whom I txt from time to time for no reason, but to make her laugh bz. And last, but certainly not least there's Terry whom is one of the nicest (though he thinks he's mean, a jerk, and sometimes an asshole...ALL his words) people you could want to know. He's been a great source of encouragement for my writing; a wealth of information regarding Unholywood (his word), writing in general, business, and life.
The four of you have proved that NOT all online connections are bad and that friendships can be formed from a distance. Thank you all for poppin some cherries in my life. *smile*
Now don't go getting your knickers in a twist here. I'm certainly NOT leaving out all of you whom swing by to read my rantings, share your thoughts, and support me. I'd love to have one huge blogger meet up where we could all meet and get to know more about each other in person instead of behind a monitor.
21 May 2007
Youth in Jeopardy
Why are our children in such a hurry to grow up? Why are younguns looking like 30-year-old men and women? More importantly, what is the rush to get be older? Hell, I’m grown and it’s far more than I can stand to deal with at times. A demanding full time job; being a single parent, and giving my hard earned money to some fool named bill with whom I’d rather not have a relationship. I highly doubt I’d want to be a child in this day and age, but to not have all the responsibilities I currently do; yeah, I’d take that. So, again I ask, “what’s up with these kids wanting to be so damn grown?
I recently witnessed the horrifying effects of a teen thinking she was grown and it broke my heart, which left me wondering are we failing our children or has society given license to such foolish ways of thinking. So here’s my dime of opinion.
Children are shown images of lush and lavish lifestyles without being taught they need to have an education and eventual gainful employment in order to maintain said lifestyle.
By the time our children have graduated high school, they’re already receiving credit card applications without being taught fiscal responsibility and the adverse effects of a negative credit report.
We’re giving our children endless amounts of designer and name brand clothes, shoes, purses, etc., of which they probably will not be able to afford and/or maintain when they’re in college or off on their own.
We’re teaching our daughters the importance of their looks instead of the importance of their brains henceforth starting the “princess” complex, which leads to them neglecting their education or expecting to get by in life on their looks.
Our sons aren’t being taught how to be men of substance instead of solely full of testosterone and the higher the bed count the better.
Our sons think being an athlete or rapper is their means of success instead of having something else to all back on. What happens when an injury occurs? Or how about not being able to secure the record deal? Misguided thought processes at their finest.
Collectively, our children are force fed the media’s hype of who they are and parents aren’t taking an active role and stand in developing their children.
To name a few...
Now, don’t get me wrong, there are a lot of parents who are playing their part, advocating discipline, education and such; however, their children are just down right defiant and challenge what they’re being taught. These are the children I fear for the most. I fear for the teen that thinks because they’re now 18 affords them certain rights and privileges and that they can make it on their own. They’ve not yet realized that they’ll need to get and maintain a car to get to/from work, an ability to balance a bank account in order to afford gas, rent, food, clothes, healthcare, etc.
Too many children are misled, misguided, and down right confused about the real world and will unfortunately be cashing some really huge reality checks before they realize that their parents were doing them a favor by enforcing rules, maintaining discipline, and continually being a hands on. Bailing a child out every time they’re in trouble only perpetuates dependency and irresponsible behavior. There are consequences to bad behavior and it’s best to receive it at the hands of a caring and meaningful parent than at the hands of law enforcement, the credit bureau, an abusive boy or girlfriend, or even death.
As a parent, I’m forced to rule with an iron fist at times and I have no qualms about it. I don’t sugar coat shit and call it candy for my child. I know the importance of providing a good foundation for her to stand on so she can do well in life. I’m sometimes happy when my daughter is forced to learn the hard way or see things for herself that I've told her, so she can understand that certain actions will cause her more harm than good. I intervene and argue with what society says about what my child should or shouldn’t have or should or shouldn’t do. Paris Hilton, Lindsay Lohan, or some other tart will not be her role model. Men, who abuse their girlfriends or wives even in the most subtle of ways, are unacceptable mates for her. Men with no drive or ambition, but have good looks aren't quality men. Without a doubt, I fall short at times, but parenting is a learning process and sometimes we have to learn together as parent and child. I can and will say this though, I chose to be a parent and therefore, it’s my responsibility to provide her with the tools and resources she’ll need to succeed. A good education is essential, being proactive in her own life, taking chances, making a change, and striving for success and happiness in her own life are the things I know she’ll need.
So far, I guess I’ve fared well and hope to God that we both continue as mother and child against the world. I pray other parents are equally successful with their child. I especially pray for those parents who are doing everything in their power to raise their children well and are defied every step of the way. I firmly believe that we all need to take an active stand with our children, siblings, nieces, nephews or any child in our lives because it really does take a village to raise a child. We truly need to revert back to some old school ways before our children are more doomed than they’re already showing signs of being.
19 May 2007
misc.
being a princess won't yeild a true prince, but a bullfrog if you dont have a brain under your tiara
Y&R officially sux. stay tuned for a full post devoted to it
i now understand why some animals eat their young
being a parent is a profession too many enter into lightly and adversely affect those trying to get the job done right
why did all the good music go?
i need to lose some weight and tone up
i want my new tattoo
i'm soooo glad i'm not growing up in this era; being born in the 60's was great
young guys keep hitting on me...so what if i'm a hottie; it still makes no sense to me *devilish grin*
i know i need to catch up on my posting and reading other blogs, but things just keep stealing my time *ugh*
i want to devote an entire day to reading blogs
i started reading again and have already completed one book and am now on another
chivalry is NOT dead
i received a few wonderful blessings this week...God is good!
gotta run; bout to get my party on...go Blu shake ya booty! and yea, imma be workin dat denim and dem heals! *woohoo!*
15 May 2007
WTF? Is it just me?
What’s with men wanting to skip actually to getting know a woman and going straight for the drawers? Then they wonder why we think so ill of them.
Check out jus.b.fli for her post on matters pertaining to men.
Who wants to go back to old school ways? Tired of these ignant (yeah, I said ignant) ass kids talking to grown folk any kind of way; men/women acting like each other is worthless; and what the &)W*%)#%& happened to discipline and order?
Where the heck are the God-fearin folk? Seems like no one is scared of God anymore…that’s why folk ain’t livin right and can’t get right.
What’s with sistas telling men they can *uck when they can’t. Stop settling just to say you have a man.
Am I the only one thinking it’s a GOOD thing to preserve the divine love and life cavity instead of giving it up cause “it’s been a while”?
For The Unit watchers…how come they gotta make the brutha the bad guy? Just cause he’s got the most rank and put the most time in, don’t make him America’s Most Wanted.
Someone; anyone please splain to me how ashy heels became acceptable? They make lotion for a damn reason.
What in the name of anything that makes sense is up with Tyra’s hair and makeup? Chick looks like a damn tranny anymore. *smh*
Why do folk come on national tv talking their biz then say, they’d get disowned or treated badly if folk knew certain things about them? Gimme an effin break already if you came on tv do you really care what folk think?
That’s all folks…massa’s callin!
08 May 2007
Misc. thoughts and quotes
How come I wish I was in school so I could have the summer off?
Sometimes being a parent really sucks!
I really like txting..hate not hearing the tone of the person at times though
Thought we’re in the middle of a major release at work, I don’t feel guilty about taking time off
Why do we work so hard and rarely use our leave time the way it’s supposed to be?
Success and achievement are more important that one’s financial statement. Life’s measurement is not only quantitative but qualitative. — Bill Byne.
Worry is nothing less that the misuse of your imagination. — Ed Foreman
Even though I’m a parent, I’m not fond of too many OPKs (other peoples kids)
Y&R is so annoying/frustrating right now, but I still watch is faithfully. What the hell does that say about me?
I was thinking that one day, I’m going to spend it just reading other people’s blogs.
My cuz is getting married in July and I’m soooo happy for her. *that means another trip to JA…woohoo!*
I’m not doing so well finding lil lady a prom dress and that mofo is in two weeks *yikes!*
How many people tell their friends they love them for no reason? I wanna start doing that.
If the person you were with wasn’t good in the bed, would you tell them?
How is porn addicting…thinking about Daniel’s dumb ass in Y&R?
Empty pockets never held anyone back. Only empty heads and empty hears can do that. — Norman Vincent Peale
The big 40 is this year and the closer I get to it, the more excited I am.
How come I listen to songs on repeat like 15 times?
When someone extends kindness and love toward you without a motive, embrace it and do your damndest to return it in kind.
I’m so disgusted with the radio that I rarely even listen to it.
Should I be ashamed to admit that I like the T-Pain song…Buy You A Drank?
I submitted my application to volunteer at the Women’s Center. I’m anxiously waiting to hear from them.
I’ve received some of the nicest compliments today and they each made me feel so beautiful and special.
Gospel music is so wonderful to wake up to…even at 4:30am
Nuff said for now…the Jewel’s light will be out at in blogland til next week, but in the mean time and in between time know that I’m thinking of each of you that read and support me.
07 May 2007
inspiration...
Dare to dream
The main thing that keeps an objective out of reach is your assumption that you cannot reach it. You're able to do precisely what you expect to be able to do.
Are there dreams that you dare not to dream because you've decided that you cannot attain them? If so, then your negative expectation has become a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Before you abandon or downgrade your most treasured dreams, consider this. When your goal is personally meaningful and compelling, you can achieve it, whatever it may be.
You are never too old or too young, too rich or too poor, to direct the energy of your life toward a compelling objective. Life is about making a difference, and that's something you can do no matter what your circumstances may be.
There is somewhere you truly wish to go, something you sincerely desire to achieve, right this very moment. Take the time to find it, commit yourself to it, and make the effort to make it happen.
Your dreams represent some of the most valuable gifts you have to give to life. Dare to dream, and allow the best of who you are to be fully expressed.-- Ralph Marston
03 May 2007
thoughts in motion
still trying to comprehend the loss of a friend's baby
allowing myself to open up more
embracing the newness of things happening in my life
looking forward to more time spent with pops
lil lady curses like a sailor (of course when i'm not around)
"son" got in lil lady's ass...and rightly so...he's a good kid
hanging with the boys and still being baby girl in the bunch after all these years amazed me, but it was so great
recognizing that the little whispers will lead to big noises if you don't pay attention aka hard ears makes a soft behind...hurts the wallet too *sigh*
change really is good
posted a 3 in 1 entry on Tuesday and so few noticed
wondering where the heck Terry is hiding...you know he's on a watch list right? maybe the feds done got'im *gasp*
eclectik-relaxtion is currently rating high on my "stalk a blog" list
for phone church and life lessons reminder courses...u know who u b!
CFM's are great conversation pieces at a club instead of the usual ish they try to come atcha with
i wish men would pop a breath mint or sip his drink before trying to run game cause bad breath will skunk a vibe with a quickness
still haven't picked up a new book to read yet and there's not excuse seeing as i have a library with books waiting for me to crack open
outing myself about past pains and actually feeling good about it; i know i've arrived now
looking forward to eating some good ass jerk chicken in Negril
nikki newman in y&r has turned into a real *itch! can't stand her ass no more
having some much needed "catch up" time with H.B
knowing you should let go is hard; actually doing it is harder, but damn do i feel good as hell for doing it though
aiight, that's it for now...back is killing me...this cycle is gonna be a major beyah...pray for your girl! oh, and have a blessed weekend!
a woman's strength will never be understood by a man
ever wanna call someone and leave a song on their vm that says some foul ish that you're thinking about them?
what the )%*#%&#)%& is up with gas prices? *smh* Big Buddy almost had to get regular this morn, but i'm overdue for an oil change, so i couldn't do him dirty like that
well, that's all for now...i'm in pain, but hanging in...this cycle is gonna be a beyah...pray for your girl *sigh*...have a great weekend and spread some love & kindness wherever you go!!!
01 May 2007
another shameless plug
What I haven't done lately!
More than we even realize, we know someone who's been a victim of one of these heinous acts. Some had the strength and courage to report it while others did not. It's easy to say that it should be reported, but for those who have done some research know, society only rapes and abuses the victim all over again. Equally sad are the many men who've been sexually victimized who do not report their crime.
The point I'm trying to make here is that the voice in my head says, "Blu, you need to be there for someone who's going through this trauma. You need to lend your ear, a warm hug, or just your presence, so they are not alone. Blu, you can and will make a difference to someone; somewhere." To this voice I humbly and willingly concede. I know it's my calling to do this and with all of the recent posts I've read and from being a survivor I know I can and will make a difference. So, today I openly make the committment to make some calls and find out where I can lend my services and today will be the day I can say, I've given of myself as Christ has given for me. Amen? Amen!
Raelly Legendary
So, I went to see Corinne and John last Thursday and of course the show was off the hook. Rayne and I figured we had ample time to get there and for the most part we did, but anyone familiar with Philly can tell you, ALWAYS allow extra time. Tower Theater, Upper Darby, PA is a PITA to get to and with the ongoing construction on Market St. a 50 minute trip can easily turn into well over an hour. We finally get to the theater after some crazy maneuvering and parking skills and arrive just in time to hear Corinne's soft, yet powerful vocals as the show started promptly @ 8:00pm. It was 8:02 when we walked into the actual seating area. *phew* She sang so beautifully and to me sounded even better than her CD, which says a lot. Unfortunately, she didn't sing Enchantment (Rayne's fave), but she was wonderful nonetheless. I would like to see her again, but at a smaller venue where I think she'll better serve her audience. She has the kind of on stage personality that would suit an intimate arena where she can bond and interact. She was very friendly, but again, she'd be better served in smaller venues.
Now, John did the damned thang people! I saw him a few years back and was enamored by his presence and vocal range. This recent show exemplified those talents and then some. He has such a commanding and interactive stage presence. He poured heart and soul into that show and the extremely diverse demographics only complimented the it. It was nice to see people of all races, gender, and ages interacting at one show. It's also a testiment to how widely John is reaching with his music. John sang almost every track from his new CD and many from his first. He flipped my two fave songs Again and Another Again, which threw me at first, but I got into hoping he'd complete Another Again, but he didn't. I was disappointed by that, but it didn't depreciate my liking for his performance or the show. He has a phenomenal band and his back up singers did a great job too. There's one in particular; a tall, thin, light complected woman who sings her skinny ass off! *lol* I'm curious to know what she'd sound like doing a solo. When John and Corinne did their version of Where Is The Love, the old Donny and Roberta hit, I was like "yeah, I hope they record that for real". Yes, it was that good!
The encore was oustanding and John showed off his rather buff body when he returned in his black wife beater. He's not my type looks wise, but he could do a body good. *devilish grin*. Go to Show Me Campaign for information regarding John's organization, which provides a variety of tools and resources for social, economcal, and developmental change/growth.
This has been a pretty watered down review of the show as I didn't highlights particular songs as they were performed, but trust and believe going to see John and/or Corinne is a good move.