Bittersweet

Well, as you all know I’d fallen for an old friend and things between us were good. The distance as we both knew would present us with a problem. In spite of it, we managed to maintain and sustain good communication and correspondence.

It was known that we’d both been dating other people off and on; however, it didn’t take away from what we felt for each other. I had the biggest challenge of all because I’d prayed with my entire being that he’d be mine for keeps this year. The few people who knew the intricate details surrounded me with their support and encouraged me to allow myself to feel and fall; especially given what the former Him had taken me through.

I have absolutely no regrets for opening my heart and emotions and allowing myself to fall completely in love. Hell, I needed to experience it to know that I could in fact love someone other than the Former and the feelings go requited without compromise.

Well, last night; in the most sincere and even romantic of ways, the current Him said that he and the woman he’d been seeing on and off had discussed becoming monogamous and he was going to give it a go. Naturally, this is not what I wanted to hear; however, in the spirit of honesty and the respect for our friendship, how could I take the news that would bruise my heart badly? Yes, believe me, it felt like a mule kicked me in my gut, but again, he was open and honest with me and that means far more to me than losing him. The reality is that I haven’t lost him entirely; we’re still friends and will remain as such. We’ll continue to correspond; we just have to do it within different confines. I will not flirt and/or be suggestive in any way as that defiles both my integrity and his pending relationship.

I sincerely wished him well with his decision and told him that I hope she treats him well or she’ll have me to deal with. *lol* You know I had to go there.

All jokes aside, I can only love and respect him more for his candor and honesty and it attests to the wonderful man that he is inside and out. He even stated that ordinarily he’d just stop communicating, but his affinity toward me prevented him from doing that and I deserved the truth. Wow!

So, there you have it; the update on my love status. I guess I’ll resume my seat on the back of the bus and keep riding until it’s worth getting off again.