why is it fair that Brandy is being sued for $50 million?
why do i wanna f*ck up a former friend?
why am i soo looking forward to warm weather?
why am i caught in the craziness of the current lunar cycle?
why did i mess up my ATM deposit?
why am i looking forward to my tax return?
why will getting my tax return make me feel like i hit the lottery (though less the millions)?
why am i gonna pimp myself for a decent pay increase now that i'm in a new position?
why don't restuarants give their left over food for the night to homeless shelters?
why are there entirely too many people homeless/hungry, in dire need of healthcare, while billions of dollars is spent on a war?
why am i looking forward to voting for a new president next year?
why do i feel like screaming at the LAN guys who decided to do maintenance on the server during the work day?
why am i so looking forward to seeing Prince during the half time show during the Super Bowl, but not the Super Bowl itself?
why am i craving sushi like it's crack?
why does the sound of certain voices make me smile in some cases and mad in others?
why do i wish i had my space heater at my desk today?
31 January 2007
29 January 2007
in case anyone was wondering
I FINALLY posted something new on my other blog The Saphyre Lounge . I've been hella busy and it's hard to be creative when you're mind is mush, but after some much needed mind release and a little provoking from a friend, I finally came up with something. If you're interested, check it out.
K-Thanks-Bye
K-Thanks-Bye
Untitled
“No deception is more dangerous than self-deception.”
Have you ever withheld something from yourself or someone else because you were afraid or didn’t know how to handle a situation? Have you ever tried to convince yourself that something or someone wasn’t as it or they seemed? If you’ve answered yes to either of these questions, then you’ve participated in the aforementioned quote. It’s nothing to be ashamed; instead something to be aware of. We’ve all done it and we all continue to do it, but now that you have this quote in your head, maybe it can and will prevent you from continuing this practice.
Our integrity is something we all value and something that defines us as whom we are, so it’s important to not delude ourselves into thinking we’re more or less than whom we are. It is monumentally important that we not allow ourselves to be pigeon-holed into thinking that we can skate through life unaccountable in some way for what we do; how we do it; and to whom we do it. Each us of has our day of reckoning coming and we all need to find ways to come clean and not continue to walk a path of self-destruction. We are no more or less better than the next person and putting someone down in any capacity to make ourselves look/feel better is harmful to both the offender and the offended. We live in trying times and it’s only been a couple weeks since we; or at least many of us celebrated the late Dr. Martin Luther King’s birthday, so let’s continue to carry his words and what he stood for forward in order to make ourselves and this world a better place.
Have you ever withheld something from yourself or someone else because you were afraid or didn’t know how to handle a situation? Have you ever tried to convince yourself that something or someone wasn’t as it or they seemed? If you’ve answered yes to either of these questions, then you’ve participated in the aforementioned quote. It’s nothing to be ashamed; instead something to be aware of. We’ve all done it and we all continue to do it, but now that you have this quote in your head, maybe it can and will prevent you from continuing this practice.
Our integrity is something we all value and something that defines us as whom we are, so it’s important to not delude ourselves into thinking we’re more or less than whom we are. It is monumentally important that we not allow ourselves to be pigeon-holed into thinking that we can skate through life unaccountable in some way for what we do; how we do it; and to whom we do it. Each us of has our day of reckoning coming and we all need to find ways to come clean and not continue to walk a path of self-destruction. We are no more or less better than the next person and putting someone down in any capacity to make ourselves look/feel better is harmful to both the offender and the offended. We live in trying times and it’s only been a couple weeks since we; or at least many of us celebrated the late Dr. Martin Luther King’s birthday, so let’s continue to carry his words and what he stood for forward in order to make ourselves and this world a better place.
24 January 2007
Are You A Bad Influence?
I was tagged by jus.b.fli for a game of Are You a Bag Influence? I responded on her site and scored a 69 for any inquiring minds who might go check out the tag. Initially, I was going to respond to the tag and post it as my blog, but I've decided against it (my apologies jus); here's my reason why.
The tag really doesn't indicate whether or not I'm really a bad influence because what I'd be admitting to, does not affect anyone else; therefore, how could I be considered a bad influence? Being a bad influence constitutes having an adverse affect on those around me and I can somehow sway them into doing something they might not want to do. I have no such influence on people unless they themselves chose to follow suit with what I'm doing and if that is the case, then they're only doing something they've already wanted to do; and are now using me as an excuse.
See, that is what I see as the problem. Many people want to take chances, risk things, and/or do something on a whim. The problem; however, is that they lack the initiative to do it and use others as a catalyst and in some cases an excuse for themselves should they get caught/found out. I say, if you want to do something, just do it. For the most part, you don't need permission, an excuse, or someone else's influence to do something.
The tag really doesn't indicate whether or not I'm really a bad influence because what I'd be admitting to, does not affect anyone else; therefore, how could I be considered a bad influence? Being a bad influence constitutes having an adverse affect on those around me and I can somehow sway them into doing something they might not want to do. I have no such influence on people unless they themselves chose to follow suit with what I'm doing and if that is the case, then they're only doing something they've already wanted to do; and are now using me as an excuse.
See, that is what I see as the problem. Many people want to take chances, risk things, and/or do something on a whim. The problem; however, is that they lack the initiative to do it and use others as a catalyst and in some cases an excuse for themselves should they get caught/found out. I say, if you want to do something, just do it. For the most part, you don't need permission, an excuse, or someone else's influence to do something.
23 January 2007
Parenting
I heard a sports announcer from ESPN radio say that one shouldn’t want to be a good parent so they can be better than their parent, but should be or wish to be a good parent because they want to. As he said it over and over again, I couldn’t help but agree with him.
Parenting is not a competition or a status to be maintained, but a dedication to raising a child to the best of our abilities; even when we fall short as we sometimes do.
It’s a known fact that many of us didn’t like the way we were raised and swore that if we became parents, we’d be nothing like our own, but that being said, should it be the motivating mindset to being a good parent? I don’t think so. When most of us became parents, it was because we wanted a child in our lives. Nowhere in our course of thinking did we say, “hey, I wanna become a parent so I can show mine how much they sucked at it by being so much better than they are.” If anyone did actually think that, then I digress; however, I’m sure that wasn’t a popular thought by any stretch of the imagination. At some point, we may have said, “I don’t want to do certain things like my parents because it hindered more than in helped me”.
Seeing as there isn’t a handy-dandy instructional guide that we’re presented with upon choosing to be a parent, so our parents and maybe a relative here or there might have been the closest thing to instructional guides we could get. Yeah, there are manuals and how to book filling shelves in libraries and bookstores, but many are too generic to say if they’d really work on our own children. Hell, who the heck has time to read when you’ve got a kid in need of regular time and attention. Free time becomes a luxury and it’s rarely spent on handy-dandy books. For many, we’ll reach for the phone and consult another parent; our own included. Bottom line is that we’ll still do what the hell we want to do anyway, but just making that call doesn’t make you feel like such a loser.
I’ve said all of this to say, that making a decision to be a parent something to take seriously as it’s a job we can’t just quit from. We should chose the role with great consideration and disengage from the thought that we’re doing it because we want to be better than someone else. We should do it for the love of the child and for unwavering, unconditional, and unrelenting love period.
Parenting is not a competition or a status to be maintained, but a dedication to raising a child to the best of our abilities; even when we fall short as we sometimes do.
It’s a known fact that many of us didn’t like the way we were raised and swore that if we became parents, we’d be nothing like our own, but that being said, should it be the motivating mindset to being a good parent? I don’t think so. When most of us became parents, it was because we wanted a child in our lives. Nowhere in our course of thinking did we say, “hey, I wanna become a parent so I can show mine how much they sucked at it by being so much better than they are.” If anyone did actually think that, then I digress; however, I’m sure that wasn’t a popular thought by any stretch of the imagination. At some point, we may have said, “I don’t want to do certain things like my parents because it hindered more than in helped me”.
Seeing as there isn’t a handy-dandy instructional guide that we’re presented with upon choosing to be a parent, so our parents and maybe a relative here or there might have been the closest thing to instructional guides we could get. Yeah, there are manuals and how to book filling shelves in libraries and bookstores, but many are too generic to say if they’d really work on our own children. Hell, who the heck has time to read when you’ve got a kid in need of regular time and attention. Free time becomes a luxury and it’s rarely spent on handy-dandy books. For many, we’ll reach for the phone and consult another parent; our own included. Bottom line is that we’ll still do what the hell we want to do anyway, but just making that call doesn’t make you feel like such a loser.
I’ve said all of this to say, that making a decision to be a parent something to take seriously as it’s a job we can’t just quit from. We should chose the role with great consideration and disengage from the thought that we’re doing it because we want to be better than someone else. We should do it for the love of the child and for unwavering, unconditional, and unrelenting love period.
19 January 2007
Empowering women
I came across this quote and wanted...no, needed to share it with my female readers. Actually, men can appreciate it too and share it with the women in their lives so they too can be empowered. Too often women are being referred to as hoes, bitches, dimes, or some other term that somehow demeans us and it's not cool. Our daughters, nieces, sisters; even mothers need to elevate themselves and the other women they encounter. I want you all to forward this quote to women you want to empower and to men who have women they too want to empower. Unfortunately, I don't know who said it, so please at least give it an "anon" when you forward it. K? Thanks!
"A wise girl knows her limits. But a great girl knows she has none"
--Anon
Stay blessed and have a great weekend.
"A wise girl knows her limits. But a great girl knows she has none"
--Anon
Stay blessed and have a great weekend.
18 January 2007
Run; Barack Run!
A couple days ago, I read an editorial in a local newspaper about the pasts of those who run for president. Bill Clinton's acknowledgement of smoking weed, but not inhaling. I've always thought that funny because you have to inhale in order to say you've smoked; but whatever; it's his story and he's sticking to it. Gee-Dubya likened his alcohol and cocaine use to his being young and reckless. Barack Obama admitted he used drugs when he was younger in a book. The author blabbed on and on about the acts of what these man did in their younger years and asked whether we'd want a man or a mouse in office (loosely translated). Personally, I don't give a flying fig if any of these men smoked weed, sniffed coke, or had homosexual sex in their younger years. What I care about is if they can do the job they've been sworn to (well, a certain someone named has proven himself ineffective). Everyone has done something in their past that they'd rather not discuss, but since they know that everything they've once done will be thrown in their face; I guess it's best to put it out there before hand.
The past lives of people should not dictate what they can do now. As previously stated, we've all done something shady, illegal, or inappropriate at some point. For some, we've not gotten caught or felt the need for disclosure. In addition, we're less likely to be raked over the coals for it either. I say again, I really don't care (unless it's something of major detriment) what they did in the past as they're all human and entitled to make mistakes. I want the person running for a position who might get my vote to be honorable in his character, live by his word, effect positive change, and strive to be the best of what his position requires.
From everything I've read and heard about Barack Obama, he's someone worthy of runinng for the presidency. I believe he'd be good for a country that is currently under seige, suffering from low morale, and in dire need of an effective and positive change. Lord knows he'd have his work cut out for him considering the muck he'd have to clean up, but given the chance and with a supportive cabinet, I believe he could do it. This isn't about his race; it's about being what the country needs. His former drug use means nothing and if that's the best they can dig up about him to sway a person's opinion of him, then they're proving nothing; especially when he's already declared it.
I'll continue to do my research, listen to his proposals, and not settle for the lesser of two evils. I want to cast my vote knowing it will actually mean something to the person on the ballot; though he won't know me personally. I want to support a man of prinicples, strong beliefs, with a love for his constituents, and overall; someone who says what he means and means what he says. I want societal restitution for the chaos currently in effect and I hope that he's the man that can make one hell of an improvement. I know it shouldn't fall solely on his head, but his influence could sway the change and foster favorable results. Maybe the United of the currently Untied States will once again mean something and morale will reign again.
I understand that running for the presidency is no easy chore, but I wish him well and hope that he has his Nike's on cause the race to the White House isn't going to be easy.
The past lives of people should not dictate what they can do now. As previously stated, we've all done something shady, illegal, or inappropriate at some point. For some, we've not gotten caught or felt the need for disclosure. In addition, we're less likely to be raked over the coals for it either. I say again, I really don't care (unless it's something of major detriment) what they did in the past as they're all human and entitled to make mistakes. I want the person running for a position who might get my vote to be honorable in his character, live by his word, effect positive change, and strive to be the best of what his position requires.
From everything I've read and heard about Barack Obama, he's someone worthy of runinng for the presidency. I believe he'd be good for a country that is currently under seige, suffering from low morale, and in dire need of an effective and positive change. Lord knows he'd have his work cut out for him considering the muck he'd have to clean up, but given the chance and with a supportive cabinet, I believe he could do it. This isn't about his race; it's about being what the country needs. His former drug use means nothing and if that's the best they can dig up about him to sway a person's opinion of him, then they're proving nothing; especially when he's already declared it.
I'll continue to do my research, listen to his proposals, and not settle for the lesser of two evils. I want to cast my vote knowing it will actually mean something to the person on the ballot; though he won't know me personally. I want to support a man of prinicples, strong beliefs, with a love for his constituents, and overall; someone who says what he means and means what he says. I want societal restitution for the chaos currently in effect and I hope that he's the man that can make one hell of an improvement. I know it shouldn't fall solely on his head, but his influence could sway the change and foster favorable results. Maybe the United of the currently Untied States will once again mean something and morale will reign again.
I understand that running for the presidency is no easy chore, but I wish him well and hope that he has his Nike's on cause the race to the White House isn't going to be easy.
17 January 2007
Is it just me?
I pondered many things on my way into work this morning and thought I should pose the question "Is it just me?"
Is it just me or....
do you get the impression that Barack Obama is going to be raked over the coals should he decide to run as it looks like he will?
are you so sick of the political lies that you'd rather see children running for office? (Lord knows many are smart enough)
do you look at the way these kids are dressed and ask yourself why?
do you question why innder city schools aren't given the fairness in funding they deserve?
have you questioned why builders insist on building huge houses on poststamp sized lots?
do you further wonder why these same companies can't build homes for low income families?
have you asked yourself what you can do to make a positive contribution to your environment?
how much longer the world will actually last?
do you want to drastically improve something about yourself and/or someone you're really close to?
have you wanted to perform a really crazy act if wanton abandoment?
revert back to a part of your childhood or life where you felt completely safe?
wished you could do something really good for someone anonymously?
do you want to ask these celebs why they would squander they're dream occupation (singing, acting, etc.,) on drugs, alcohol, or crime?
do you want to force feed triple zero models?
Well, that's what's going on in the Jewel's mind today...have a blessed day!
Is it just me or....
do you get the impression that Barack Obama is going to be raked over the coals should he decide to run as it looks like he will?
are you so sick of the political lies that you'd rather see children running for office? (Lord knows many are smart enough)
do you look at the way these kids are dressed and ask yourself why?
do you question why innder city schools aren't given the fairness in funding they deserve?
have you questioned why builders insist on building huge houses on poststamp sized lots?
do you further wonder why these same companies can't build homes for low income families?
have you asked yourself what you can do to make a positive contribution to your environment?
how much longer the world will actually last?
do you want to drastically improve something about yourself and/or someone you're really close to?
have you wanted to perform a really crazy act if wanton abandoment?
revert back to a part of your childhood or life where you felt completely safe?
wished you could do something really good for someone anonymously?
do you want to ask these celebs why they would squander they're dream occupation (singing, acting, etc.,) on drugs, alcohol, or crime?
do you want to force feed triple zero models?
Well, that's what's going on in the Jewel's mind today...have a blessed day!
16 January 2007
Change is good...I think
I had high aspirations of posting at least two additional posts by now, but things got the best of me and I wasn't able to post sooner. My Monday post would have been about random acts of kindness and tolerance in keeping with the legacy of Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. Instead of posting, I kicked my sister and brother in law out of their house so they could have some time alone and take care of some errands while I watched my twin niece and nephew. My act of kindness was far better than a post. Agree?
Anyhoo, I accepted a new position within my company, which is very demanding and will alter how I spend my day; hence the title of this post. I did more work today than I have in months and it will continue for some time. Where I used to be able to blog during the day, I probably won't, so please don't think I've forgotten about my lovely readers. Please hang in there and check my blog either very early in the day or later in the evening.
Sorry for this partly lame post, but it's getting late and I really don't have much on my mind. I'm trying to catch up on my DVR'd t.v shows and catch up on other things I would have normally done at work like read blogs...lol! I guess I was pretty spoiled with my previous position. Now, I'm a cashing a big, fat reality check that I actually have to do some work to make that minimum wage. *snicker*
Okay folks, that's all for now, but rest assured the Jewel will keep on shining and continue to bless you with the wrath of my mental accuities.
Anyhoo, I accepted a new position within my company, which is very demanding and will alter how I spend my day; hence the title of this post. I did more work today than I have in months and it will continue for some time. Where I used to be able to blog during the day, I probably won't, so please don't think I've forgotten about my lovely readers. Please hang in there and check my blog either very early in the day or later in the evening.
Sorry for this partly lame post, but it's getting late and I really don't have much on my mind. I'm trying to catch up on my DVR'd t.v shows and catch up on other things I would have normally done at work like read blogs...lol! I guess I was pretty spoiled with my previous position. Now, I'm a cashing a big, fat reality check that I actually have to do some work to make that minimum wage. *snicker*
Okay folks, that's all for now, but rest assured the Jewel will keep on shining and continue to bless you with the wrath of my mental accuities.
13 January 2007
10 things...getting to know me
I was tagged by Urban Butterfly to do this, so here it is...
- I think everyone who knows me knows...I am a good cook
- I am...a simple kinda gal who enjoys the less chaotic things in life
- My favorite perfume is...now Hypnose by Lancome. I happened on it and fell in love. Polama Picasso was/is still my signature scent and I do feel like I'm cheating on her, but Hypose is sooo sexy and fits my style/moods
- I love Music...I listen to music of almost any genre. It is a staple in my life and I'm particularly moved my lyrics
- My favorite pastime is...reading. I have always loved to read and it's something I can do anytime; anyplace. Hanging out in Borders Cafe going through magazines is a wonderful part of my week
- I am most comfortable...left to my own devices. I enjoy company, but am equally content being alone and doing whatever comes to mind
- When I am stressed out...I love to cook. It helps to relax me and takes my mind of other things. Cooking allows me to be creative and try new things.
- I don't like...being around negative people. They have a depleting energy.
- I am not a very good...at math, although I can calculate percentages pretty well when shopping...lol
- My indulgence...books, pastries, and cooking.
11 January 2007
Turned out!!
I was listening to some music and thought about songs that make you act up. There are songs that you hear and you feel like making a booty call or songs that make you angry and want to get all destructive and shit. And there are songs that just relax you. You name it, there's a song for just about any mood. Well, let me share something with you.
There's a Prince song called Tambourine from the Around The World In A Day CD and it does all kinds of crazy things to me. The song is loud, has a killer guitar rift, and lyrics that are borderline nonsensical, but hell; I like it anyway. Whenever I've listened to this song, I get this crazy image of me pole dancing or dancing in some crazy and suggestive way. Hell, the song has made me more horny than not whenever I've listened to it. The song has such a gravitational pull to me that I REFUSE to listen to it in mixed company. I even further REFUSE to listen to it with a guy; even if I'm majorly digging him. Fact is I've NEVER listened to it with a guy. Why? Because I'm not sure I'd be able to restrain myself and he might get hurt. I'm sure the kind of hurt that I'd be inflicting might be in some ways pleasurable to him, but when a song can bring that much freak potential out of you, it needs to be carefully contained or administered in doses that aren't not life threatening.
I'm sure we all have playlists that we'll have playing in order to make things sway in your favor or there might be a movie you'll play when that certain someone comes over. I call them the Drawers Grabbers *snicker* because they're used intentionally for that purpose. So, now that I've disclosed what song does me in, do tell what song or even movie you can't listen to or watch in mixed company. And what is the one song or movie that is your Drawers Grabber.
There's a Prince song called Tambourine from the Around The World In A Day CD and it does all kinds of crazy things to me. The song is loud, has a killer guitar rift, and lyrics that are borderline nonsensical, but hell; I like it anyway. Whenever I've listened to this song, I get this crazy image of me pole dancing or dancing in some crazy and suggestive way. Hell, the song has made me more horny than not whenever I've listened to it. The song has such a gravitational pull to me that I REFUSE to listen to it in mixed company. I even further REFUSE to listen to it with a guy; even if I'm majorly digging him. Fact is I've NEVER listened to it with a guy. Why? Because I'm not sure I'd be able to restrain myself and he might get hurt. I'm sure the kind of hurt that I'd be inflicting might be in some ways pleasurable to him, but when a song can bring that much freak potential out of you, it needs to be carefully contained or administered in doses that aren't not life threatening.
I'm sure we all have playlists that we'll have playing in order to make things sway in your favor or there might be a movie you'll play when that certain someone comes over. I call them the Drawers Grabbers *snicker* because they're used intentionally for that purpose. So, now that I've disclosed what song does me in, do tell what song or even movie you can't listen to or watch in mixed company. And what is the one song or movie that is your Drawers Grabber.
10 January 2007
Is he serious?
Okay, so I know you all read a newspaper or listen to the news, so what I'm about to say shouldn't come of any surprise to you. Bush wants to send another 20 thousand troops to Iraq! In his state of the union assdress (intentionally spelled) tonight, he'll speak on this subject. I'm sure it's not just me who has a problem with this. Although I'm not one for political debates, I couldn't help but speak my mind on this matter. As a soon to be retired service woman, I still do not in any way support this so-called war. I do; however, support my brothers/sisters in uniform. I pray for them daily and I pray for their friends and families in their respective home states. I've sent money, products, lent my services to help affected families because I know their loss is great.
I known men/women sent overseas to fight; fight; and keep fighting with no end in sight. One or two of them have done more than one tour and have come home to find their lives in complete disarray. From the PST (post traumatic stress), to the adjustments to civilian life, to disconnection from their family members, just to name a few. Some of the people I know overseas were National Guard and Reservists who were quickly and in some ways inadequately trained (physically. mentally, or emotionally) and prepared for such a major transition. Hell, I'm sure the active duty components weren't all jumping for joy either.
Back to my original thought. The president wants to spend more and more billions of dollars in a war that has no end in sight and risk more than the already 3000 thousand dead, and the countless injured because he's a bitch ass limp dick (all my opinion only so don't get your knickers in a twist if you've got love for the moron...I mean; man) who's making money and getting his jollies off with this so-called war. With his proposal to send more troops to Iraq, who the hell is gonna be left here to take care of things should there be a need? National Guard and Reservists who are already overseas or in the stages of being sent aren't going to be here as needed. A highly valued and highly needed comodity is going to be across the world doing who knows what leaving the country in a precarious position. Can you say bent over ready to be fuck with no KY jelly? I can.
I'm sorry people, I'm looking forward to my retirement; I've earned it. The many that have done multiple tours need their time at home. Another sad reality is that those returning to Iraq aren't in the 20-25 year old range. They are in the 35-45 range whom are also looking to retire or at least spend their remaining time not being shot at for reasons unbeknownst to them. Again, I recognize and realize that they signed up for whichever branch of service, but hell, when is enough; enough?
Every time I read the paper, I hear of another life lost; another life injured; another life impeded because of this shit. Young men and women are coming back to the U.S to nothing. Their lives and time vested isn't compensated by their so-called Uncle Sam. He basically sends them home with the bare minimums and they're on their own. I heard of a woman who had to give her son up for adoption because she suffered so much trauma that she couldn't raise him. When asked what services are being provided for her to help her mentally, socially, and financially, and she said, she was receiving little or no care. WTF? This young woman has risked her life for her country and gets pissed on upon return. Ugh!
As you can see, this is a very sensitive topic for me and one that I can go on and on about, but I'll end here. I have one last point I need to make before I end though. So, how come the pres can spend billions of dollars on a war, but can't send or allocate funds to rebuild from the damage of hurricane Katrina? People are still displaced; lives are still in turmoil; losses have been substantial and yet, still nothing is being done. FEMA and their bed fellows have royally fucked millions and no one is fighting for them. Again WTF??? I'd much rather see the National Guard and Reservists doing things in Louisianna and the other adversely affected states than seeing them sent overseas.
I'm done...
I known men/women sent overseas to fight; fight; and keep fighting with no end in sight. One or two of them have done more than one tour and have come home to find their lives in complete disarray. From the PST (post traumatic stress), to the adjustments to civilian life, to disconnection from their family members, just to name a few. Some of the people I know overseas were National Guard and Reservists who were quickly and in some ways inadequately trained (physically. mentally, or emotionally) and prepared for such a major transition. Hell, I'm sure the active duty components weren't all jumping for joy either.
Back to my original thought. The president wants to spend more and more billions of dollars in a war that has no end in sight and risk more than the already 3000 thousand dead, and the countless injured because he's a bitch ass limp dick (all my opinion only so don't get your knickers in a twist if you've got love for the moron...I mean; man) who's making money and getting his jollies off with this so-called war. With his proposal to send more troops to Iraq, who the hell is gonna be left here to take care of things should there be a need? National Guard and Reservists who are already overseas or in the stages of being sent aren't going to be here as needed. A highly valued and highly needed comodity is going to be across the world doing who knows what leaving the country in a precarious position. Can you say bent over ready to be fuck with no KY jelly? I can.
I'm sorry people, I'm looking forward to my retirement; I've earned it. The many that have done multiple tours need their time at home. Another sad reality is that those returning to Iraq aren't in the 20-25 year old range. They are in the 35-45 range whom are also looking to retire or at least spend their remaining time not being shot at for reasons unbeknownst to them. Again, I recognize and realize that they signed up for whichever branch of service, but hell, when is enough; enough?
Every time I read the paper, I hear of another life lost; another life injured; another life impeded because of this shit. Young men and women are coming back to the U.S to nothing. Their lives and time vested isn't compensated by their so-called Uncle Sam. He basically sends them home with the bare minimums and they're on their own. I heard of a woman who had to give her son up for adoption because she suffered so much trauma that she couldn't raise him. When asked what services are being provided for her to help her mentally, socially, and financially, and she said, she was receiving little or no care. WTF? This young woman has risked her life for her country and gets pissed on upon return. Ugh!
As you can see, this is a very sensitive topic for me and one that I can go on and on about, but I'll end here. I have one last point I need to make before I end though. So, how come the pres can spend billions of dollars on a war, but can't send or allocate funds to rebuild from the damage of hurricane Katrina? People are still displaced; lives are still in turmoil; losses have been substantial and yet, still nothing is being done. FEMA and their bed fellows have royally fucked millions and no one is fighting for them. Again WTF??? I'd much rather see the National Guard and Reservists doing things in Louisianna and the other adversely affected states than seeing them sent overseas.
I'm done...
09 January 2007
I see stupid people
A few things that go through my mind when I'm exposed to the mentally challenged...
What I wanna say to someone who was so on my nerves...
What I wanna say to people who insist on doing dumb shit in public because they honestly think they're funny...
What I wanna say to people who keep talking even when they're are making no damn sense...
or 
What I wanna say to people who insist on telling me shit when I'm not listening or even when I've said I really don't wanna know...
What I wanna say when someone has exhausted the very last second of my sanity...
What I wanna say to someone who was so on my nerves...
What I wanna say to people who insist on doing dumb shit in public because they honestly think they're funny...
What I wanna say to people who keep talking even when they're are making no damn sense...
or What I wanna say to people who insist on telling me shit when I'm not listening or even when I've said I really don't wanna know...
What I wanna say when someone has exhausted the very last second of my sanity...
08 January 2007
The Upside of Anger
Have you ever been pissed off or angry and not really known why? You scour your mind trying to recall who you’ve been in contact with, what you’ve eaten; read; or even watched on TV. Out of the plethora of things that could have pissed you off or made you angry, you still can’t seem to come up with that one thing that really has you twisted. That in itself makes you even more pissed off/angry. So, you sit in quiet reflection and then the proverbial lightening bolt hits you; you’re mad at yourself. You’re mad because there was something you should have done/said that you haven’t. You’re made because the much-needed item that was on sale is not in stock. You’re mad because someone let you down; hurt your feelings; lied; etc., but moreso because you know you had a role in it happening. You’re mad because you made excuses for whatever could have, should have, or would have occurred or not had you not allowed it. I think that’s the worst anger of all.
One of the many things I’ve chosen to correct in myself during this quarter is to not allow myself to succumb to this level of anger. There will be times where protocol dictates my restraint, but I will find a way to express my discord. There are many that say you shouldn’t do this or that because you might make a bad situation worse, or hurt someone’s feelings; what about my feelings? What about the lack of regard that person had toward me? Am I supposed to just suck it up and take it? Hmm? On a limited scale I’d say yes; however, overall my feelings count too. I am accountable for what I allow to happen, but there are situations beyond my control and it’s those that I will no longer allow the anger to consume me. I will diffuse what I’m able instead of imploding or exploding. I will embrace my anger instead of dismissing it because my embracing it allows me to heal adequately. Thus being the upside of anger. I will accept that my feelings are normal and healthy. The anger is very much a part of what makes me human and it should not be discarded. That would be like me being happy, but slapping someone instead of hugging them.
I think about some people I know who act out because they can’t or won’t display their real feelings or emotions. These people will hurt you, say mean things to you, and treat you inexcusably because they are afraid or unwilling to embrace their authentic being. This kind of behavior promotes the concept that misery likes company and I’m sorry, I ain’t that kinda gal. I like peace and contentment and while I know it’s not always a viable option, I’ll be damned if I allow another’s negativity to cause me harm or internal dysfunction. I, my friends have been gravely affected by said people and I refuse to allow it anymore.
Being angry is normal, allowable, and understandable at times. What it’s not is a weapon one uses to inflict harm to another or themselves because they’ve chosen no viable alternatives. In a world that is hell bent on the promotion of negativity, let’s look at the man/woman in the mirror and start to make a change. Yes, the Michael Jackson song, Man In The Mirror is playing in my head; and you have to admit, it’s pertinent.
Live; love; laugh; and learn.
One of the many things I’ve chosen to correct in myself during this quarter is to not allow myself to succumb to this level of anger. There will be times where protocol dictates my restraint, but I will find a way to express my discord. There are many that say you shouldn’t do this or that because you might make a bad situation worse, or hurt someone’s feelings; what about my feelings? What about the lack of regard that person had toward me? Am I supposed to just suck it up and take it? Hmm? On a limited scale I’d say yes; however, overall my feelings count too. I am accountable for what I allow to happen, but there are situations beyond my control and it’s those that I will no longer allow the anger to consume me. I will diffuse what I’m able instead of imploding or exploding. I will embrace my anger instead of dismissing it because my embracing it allows me to heal adequately. Thus being the upside of anger. I will accept that my feelings are normal and healthy. The anger is very much a part of what makes me human and it should not be discarded. That would be like me being happy, but slapping someone instead of hugging them.
I think about some people I know who act out because they can’t or won’t display their real feelings or emotions. These people will hurt you, say mean things to you, and treat you inexcusably because they are afraid or unwilling to embrace their authentic being. This kind of behavior promotes the concept that misery likes company and I’m sorry, I ain’t that kinda gal. I like peace and contentment and while I know it’s not always a viable option, I’ll be damned if I allow another’s negativity to cause me harm or internal dysfunction. I, my friends have been gravely affected by said people and I refuse to allow it anymore.
Being angry is normal, allowable, and understandable at times. What it’s not is a weapon one uses to inflict harm to another or themselves because they’ve chosen no viable alternatives. In a world that is hell bent on the promotion of negativity, let’s look at the man/woman in the mirror and start to make a change. Yes, the Michael Jackson song, Man In The Mirror is playing in my head; and you have to admit, it’s pertinent.
Live; love; laugh; and learn.
04 January 2007
Random shit (for lack of a better post)
My (imagined) ADD is full gear today and I can’t concentrate, so this is my post for today.
Ever watch people and make up stories about them?
How come just when you break down to do #2 in public as much as you hate to; someone walks in and you do everything to hold it back?
Have you ever known someone who didn’t wash their hands after they use the bathroom and you avoid them like the plague?
Sometimes I get scared I’m going to fart when I’m being examined by the GYN. (I know…TMI…lmao…this post IS called Random Shit)
Do you eat from the pretzel/cookie/candy jar on someone’s desk?
Do you ever want to, but don’t cause you’re skeeved out thinking that someone who just picked their nose, didn’t wash after using the toilet, or whathaveyou, has already been in that jar?
While grocery shopping, do you or have you ever, tasted something BEFORE you decided if you should purchase it?
I wondered what the lady at the traffic light was listening to cause she kept smiling.
I wish I really had a SaPhyre Lounge for you all to come to
If I were a thief, I could have used a coworkers credit card for fraudulent purchases because he talks loud and said his cc # & the exp date out loud while on the phone
I laughed at a kid who fell down and I didn’t even feel bad about it
Sometimes I see people and say, “they look like they stink”. I know it’s mean, but they really do look like that to me
“One time at band camp”…lmao…just kidding, I’ve never been to band camp; I just like the way that sounds.
Ever see someone come back from lunch and they look like they just got done fucking?
There is a guy (I’ve leave identity less) that has a small dick and has been said to be lousy in bed (this is NOT a rumor) who was talking about sex and how good he is etc., and I wanted to laugh so hard and say, “that’s so not true”, but instead I laughed inwardly
I have the Post Secret books; one day I’ll have the courage to send in one of my own
The cleaning guy smelled nice
Why the hell does my net connex at work decide to act up right when I’m ready to post?
Ever watch people and make up stories about them?
How come just when you break down to do #2 in public as much as you hate to; someone walks in and you do everything to hold it back?
Have you ever known someone who didn’t wash their hands after they use the bathroom and you avoid them like the plague?
Sometimes I get scared I’m going to fart when I’m being examined by the GYN. (I know…TMI…lmao…this post IS called Random Shit)
Do you eat from the pretzel/cookie/candy jar on someone’s desk?
Do you ever want to, but don’t cause you’re skeeved out thinking that someone who just picked their nose, didn’t wash after using the toilet, or whathaveyou, has already been in that jar?
While grocery shopping, do you or have you ever, tasted something BEFORE you decided if you should purchase it?
I wondered what the lady at the traffic light was listening to cause she kept smiling.
I wish I really had a SaPhyre Lounge for you all to come to
If I were a thief, I could have used a coworkers credit card for fraudulent purchases because he talks loud and said his cc # & the exp date out loud while on the phone
I laughed at a kid who fell down and I didn’t even feel bad about it
Sometimes I see people and say, “they look like they stink”. I know it’s mean, but they really do look like that to me
“One time at band camp”…lmao…just kidding, I’ve never been to band camp; I just like the way that sounds.
Ever see someone come back from lunch and they look like they just got done fucking?
There is a guy (I’ve leave identity less) that has a small dick and has been said to be lousy in bed (this is NOT a rumor) who was talking about sex and how good he is etc., and I wanted to laugh so hard and say, “that’s so not true”, but instead I laughed inwardly
I have the Post Secret books; one day I’ll have the courage to send in one of my own
The cleaning guy smelled nice
Why the hell does my net connex at work decide to act up right when I’m ready to post?
03 January 2007
All Love For Good
"Isn't all love for good
How do we get this misunderstood
God doesn't care who we love
Just that we do"
-Micheal Tomlinson (Calling Me Back to the Wild CD 1995)
As I listened to this song (it inspired today's post), which was written by Mr. Tomlinson in memory of his sister who was a lesbian and it caused a family divide. I watched Family Stone last night which was a surprisingly good movie. I recalled the scene at the dinner table where the very bougie Meredith questioned the relationship between an interracial couple who wanted to adopt a little boy. Not only was the couple interracial, but they were gay and the white partner was deaf. By her standards, there were so many things "wrong" with that relationship and for every time she tried to clean up her comments, she progressively made a bad situation worse.
Why is it that we consider anything that we wouldn't do or can't fathom wrong? Aside from a few things, which are inherrantly wrong, (child sexual acts to name one), why does whom one chooses to love have to be an issue? From everything I've read in life, it says that love is BLIND. So if it's truly blind, then it does not see color, gender, age, or handicap. Love does not see; it feels.
All too often we allow ourselves to get caught up in what someone else says/thinks is right or wrong and that in itself is wrong. It shows that we are incapable of thinking for ourselves and that we are all lambs waiting to be slaughtered because we follow and not lead. Think about how politricks (intentionally spelled) is used to determine someone's worth, meanwhile we've seen many politrickions shamed for the same thing they supposedly have an issue against. Hell, we have a president who's right hand man has a lesbian daughter who's pregnant. How can he call this man his friend/ally when the pres stands against the things that the mans daughter is? Hypocricy at its very finest. There are preachers denoucning homosexuality, but we find out they've had a gay lover for many years. These very people talk a good game on tolerance and love for humanity, yet their actions speak the polar opposite.
Love gets tossed around like a four letter word and instead of being embraced and used for the greater good, it's discarded and disregarded because someone has an opinion on how it should be practiced or displayed. We can show more love and humanity for an animal we'll hold hostage in a zoo or in our homes, but be can't love someone because they're of another color, orientation, age, etc. What kind of bullshit is that? It's appalling what is happening in and to the world and we wonder why there is such a major shift in the increase of acts of nature. It's because Mother Nature is reclaiming what is rightfully hers and she'd rather perform a true act of cleansing instead of allowing self-righteous and indignant people to do it and tell her what love truly is.
The day of reckoning is closer than we can imagine!!!
How do we get this misunderstood
God doesn't care who we love
Just that we do"
-Micheal Tomlinson (Calling Me Back to the Wild CD 1995)
As I listened to this song (it inspired today's post), which was written by Mr. Tomlinson in memory of his sister who was a lesbian and it caused a family divide. I watched Family Stone last night which was a surprisingly good movie. I recalled the scene at the dinner table where the very bougie Meredith questioned the relationship between an interracial couple who wanted to adopt a little boy. Not only was the couple interracial, but they were gay and the white partner was deaf. By her standards, there were so many things "wrong" with that relationship and for every time she tried to clean up her comments, she progressively made a bad situation worse.
Why is it that we consider anything that we wouldn't do or can't fathom wrong? Aside from a few things, which are inherrantly wrong, (child sexual acts to name one), why does whom one chooses to love have to be an issue? From everything I've read in life, it says that love is BLIND. So if it's truly blind, then it does not see color, gender, age, or handicap. Love does not see; it feels.
All too often we allow ourselves to get caught up in what someone else says/thinks is right or wrong and that in itself is wrong. It shows that we are incapable of thinking for ourselves and that we are all lambs waiting to be slaughtered because we follow and not lead. Think about how politricks (intentionally spelled) is used to determine someone's worth, meanwhile we've seen many politrickions shamed for the same thing they supposedly have an issue against. Hell, we have a president who's right hand man has a lesbian daughter who's pregnant. How can he call this man his friend/ally when the pres stands against the things that the mans daughter is? Hypocricy at its very finest. There are preachers denoucning homosexuality, but we find out they've had a gay lover for many years. These very people talk a good game on tolerance and love for humanity, yet their actions speak the polar opposite.
Love gets tossed around like a four letter word and instead of being embraced and used for the greater good, it's discarded and disregarded because someone has an opinion on how it should be practiced or displayed. We can show more love and humanity for an animal we'll hold hostage in a zoo or in our homes, but be can't love someone because they're of another color, orientation, age, etc. What kind of bullshit is that? It's appalling what is happening in and to the world and we wonder why there is such a major shift in the increase of acts of nature. It's because Mother Nature is reclaiming what is rightfully hers and she'd rather perform a true act of cleansing instead of allowing self-righteous and indignant people to do it and tell her what love truly is.
The day of reckoning is closer than we can imagine!!!
02 January 2007
From Legal to Illegal
Last week there was a story in my area about a baby boy found in a trash bag of a dumspter at a housing complex. I gasped and was sickened by the disturbing story and the heinous act performed by the misguided and selfish woman. There was limited details, but I later learned that the discarded baby was that of an 18 year old girl who'd concealed her pregnancy, delivered it alone, and then tossed it before anyone could find out. To make a bad story worse, the girl was the sister of someone I knew; though remotely. Considering the entire family is one huge bowl of dysfunction, I could only continue to shake my head and cuss openly about her flagrant disregard for life. Wait, one! Let me add that the stank ass-triflin-no good-selfish-cruel-inhumane-lame excuse for a flesh went to the mall after she'd given birth and trashed her newborn son. I see you all staring at the screen saying to yourselves, "did she really just say that?" Yes, people, she went to the mall!!!!
I will now continue. I'm trying to wrap my head around this crime and come to terms with what I'd heard and had confirmed by an extremely reliable source. The father of the child had no idea chick was pregnant because she said she was getting an abortion of which is a LEGAL act, but instead she decides to not terminate. She goes on to conceal the pregnancy and then attempt to kill the child in an act which is currently ILLEGAL. Are you getting where I'm going with this?
How in God's name does a person do something so fucking ruthless? There are laws to PROTECT a mother who decides she doesn't want the child if she takes it to a safe place. So again, I question why a person would go from two perfectly legal acts to performing a heinous AND illegal one??? There are women torturing their bodies with all kinds of hormone therapies in order to conceive and here we have some wretched 18 year old who conceives and tosses the baby with the trash. What the hell has the world come to when we blantantly disregard life to this capacity?
Personally, I'd like to slap the shit out of her for what she did. She better be glad I'm not on that jury cause there'd be no way in hell she'd get anything but a guilty verdict and the promotion of the highest penalities for her crime. So far she's looking at 5-10 for child endangerment and other related charges.
I will now continue. I'm trying to wrap my head around this crime and come to terms with what I'd heard and had confirmed by an extremely reliable source. The father of the child had no idea chick was pregnant because she said she was getting an abortion of which is a LEGAL act, but instead she decides to not terminate. She goes on to conceal the pregnancy and then attempt to kill the child in an act which is currently ILLEGAL. Are you getting where I'm going with this?
How in God's name does a person do something so fucking ruthless? There are laws to PROTECT a mother who decides she doesn't want the child if she takes it to a safe place. So again, I question why a person would go from two perfectly legal acts to performing a heinous AND illegal one??? There are women torturing their bodies with all kinds of hormone therapies in order to conceive and here we have some wretched 18 year old who conceives and tosses the baby with the trash. What the hell has the world come to when we blantantly disregard life to this capacity?
Personally, I'd like to slap the shit out of her for what she did. She better be glad I'm not on that jury cause there'd be no way in hell she'd get anything but a guilty verdict and the promotion of the highest penalities for her crime. So far she's looking at 5-10 for child endangerment and other related charges.
01 January 2007
!!HAPPY NEW YEAR !!
I trust that each of you had a truly Merry Christmas and that the New Year will be filled with all the joy and promise that each of you desire.
Formalities now aside, I'll get straight to the point. I don't make new year's resolutions in January, I make them in September, which to me is my new year because that's my birth month. I reveiw the exiting year and then look forward to and plan for the upcoming year. So far, I've achieved some insurmountable goals, closed some much needed doors, open some new ones, and strived to find the positive in even the most negative of situations. The first quarter of my new year wasn't easy, but I made it and I'm proud of myself for that. With January starting the next quarter of my new year, I find myself evolving and in some ways digressing into being the woman I was always intended to be. The evolution is blugeoning and I'm very excited about the progressive steps I have planned. As for the digression, it's not a bad thing. I'm no longer witholding the darker side of my personality and have decided to embrace her and allow her voice to be heard. I realized by stunning or dismissing her presence; the stronger force she'll be once she is allowed out. That my dears ones isn't always a pretty sight! So, as stated; I will at times go to the dark side. I hear Darth Vader calling...lol!
Okay, jokes aside; I plan on making 007 my personal Jane Bond year. I will have my martini however I damn well please, cause shaken or stirred, it's gonna taste bloody good anyway. In addition, I'll complete my missions even if it means pulling out the big guns and taking some folk down. I'll will try to keep the destruction and bloodshed to a minimum. My charm school etiquette will kick in.
My articluate friend Terry over at The Cheap Seats left me with some wonderful guidance prior to his break and I advise you all to go read it. Potential Energy. It's meaningful and sustaining information that will carry you through the new year and beyond.
Medication was not prescribed for me over Christmas so that means I'm even more mentally challenged than last year and will be even more mentally dangerous, so prepare yourselves for some serious straight; no chaser blogging.
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