02 April 2009

wonderlust

Steve's on a rampage and if he's not satiated soon, he's gonna have me in a world of hurt. Who's Steve? As I've said before, Steve is the name of my libido. Why? Because my libido is like that of an 18 y/o boy, so it needed a name; and so Steve was born.

Dreadz is back in Jamaica and while I miss him much and like him in equal capacity to my missing him, I'm still not sure what long term potential we have; thus leaving me in one hell of a dilema. Legal is my old college friend whom I've had drinks with and hang out with from time to time. He's a good, likeable, and decent guy who could make a good boyfriend, but with his work schedule and my not being sure of my true status with Dreadz, I'm just enjoying his company for now. Toolbelt is trying to get back in, but he's still in time out, so while he's definitely a Triple Threat (deep, dark, and delicious) he's not even worth slutting out. His drama keeps me very cautious. Then there's Achilies Heel. OMG! *swoon* We'd had a major falling out and then managed to work through it and become friends again. A few weeks ago he called and we had a surpisingly long and good conversation. Yesterday, we had an all day txt conversation and the conversation started one way and ended up taking a left turn in Albuquerque with loaded guns at the firing range. Boy, was that ever one heck of a conversation; leaving Steve ready to defy anything I might say and do his own thing.

Now, I didn't bring y'all here to divulge the TMI of my personal life, I'm simply venting as a means to calm Steve down and keep his desires at bay. You see, what's also pissing Steve of is that I gave up self-gratification for Lent seeing as I really don't have any vices to speak of. I don't really drink. I don't smoke or eat really bad foods, so I figured self-gratification was something that I'd miss. Oh, and boy, do I ever miss it. Between my current dry spell since Dreadz absense and my not self-fulfilling, Steve has been wreaking havoc on my innards. He's running around inside me like a richotcheting bullet. I'm trying to be a good girl; I really am, but I really don't know how much longer I can go on.

The irony of it all is that I was celibate for over two years and pretty much didn't give it a second thought, but now I feel like a damn fiend. I guess once you let the cat out the bag (no pun intended), it's pretty hard to put it back in. *Slish, I know you're having a field day with this*. LMAO!

I'm a woman with options and will have to decide which box off the multiple choice list I'll check off. Whatever or whomever I choose, it will be exacted of clear conscious and sound mind; or what's left of it. *giggle*

Have a great weekend chillens!


Love to live; live to love!

11 comments:

Ms. Liryc said...

lol lol.. once that beasts hits it hits HARD... try to keep it at bay, cause its about to be let loose and I feel sympathy for the poor dude who has to deal with Steve. He's going to wreck havoc on that poor soul!!!

This post was funny... LMFAO @ deep, dark, delicious now that is what I call a triple threat! YUM!!

You're going to be ok... You know what I've come to realize.. you don't really see the value of self gratification until you don't do it anymore..

Keep holdin on sistah, keep holdin on!!

CareyCarey said...

I usually have an opinion on most subjects but I am not going to touch this one :-)

Believer said...

You not only want to be satisfied physically but mentally, and whoever is committed to you, he had better bring guns a blazing in both departments. You won't tolerate humdrum sex or conversation. Oh, and I hope he has a couple of good fights left in him, which means great make up sex for both. ;)

A word to Steve, “Calm the hell down!”

Blu Jewel said...

@Liryc - Your comment is too funny. I'm so trying to be good, but this beast named Steve is a force likened to hurricane Katrina. *ugh* I'm holding on for dear life.

@Carey - I left you speechless? Wow! Was it something I said? *lol*

@ Believer - You're so right that I have to have both the mental and physical combination to make it all worthwhile. Let's hope Steve listens to "Auntie Beliver" yelling at him.

love to live; live to love!

Mr.Slish said...

You giving the Slasher waaaay too much info..You know he's a predator...lol

Hawa Bond said...

LOL @ Slish!

It is so true about letting that cat out of the bag. I did the celibacy thing for like 2.5 years in my 20's, and again for 3 years in my 30's. Once you get started, it's like Lays Potato Chips. Betcha can't eat just one.

====@====
Hawa, author of Fackin Truth Blog and Cleanse Master Remix

Blu Jewel said...

@Slish - Trust and believe Steve ain't scared of the Slasher. *lol*

@ Hawa - Love the Lay's (no pun intended) analogy, and it's oh so true

love to live; live to love!

blackwomenblowthetrumpet.blogspot.com said...

Hi there...

May the preacher add in two cents??

CELIBACY is always an option ...and one with many profound emotional and spiritual benefits...

Peace, blessings and godliness,
Lisa

T.C. said...

like everyone else has said you can be celibate all day long but AS SOON as you let it out even for a little bit its OVER...

i don't even know what to tell you i have had so many wet dreams my dag on self as of last with my 9 months of nothing...but imma hold on and hold out...because its what's BEST for me...

so calm down...take a shower or workout..LOL...but don't do it...LOL

Keith said...

I usually have something smart alecky to say when Eb The Celeb writes on this subject...but I am out of quips and just speechless by this...So I'm going to leave this alone. :)

Childfree Sexpot said...

I can SO relate to the way you describe your ravenous sex drive!

Babe, I have been voluntarily celibate since late November and like you, I am ONE horny ASS chick- but you know what, I do NOT miss dick. Like, not AT ALL! It's weird.

Hitachi Magic wand is all a girl needs.