Steve's on a rampage and if he's not satiated soon, he's gonna have me in a world of hurt. Who's Steve? As I've said before, Steve is the name of my libido. Why? Because my libido is like that of an 18 y/o boy, so it needed a name; and so Steve was born.
Dreadz is back in Jamaica and while I miss him much and like him in equal capacity to my missing him, I'm still not sure what long term potential we have; thus leaving me in one hell of a dilema. Legal is my old college friend whom I've had drinks with and hang out with from time to time. He's a good, likeable, and decent guy who could make a good boyfriend, but with his work schedule and my not being sure of my true status with Dreadz, I'm just enjoying his company for now. Toolbelt is trying to get back in, but he's still in time out, so while he's definitely a Triple Threat (deep, dark, and delicious) he's not even worth slutting out. His drama keeps me very cautious. Then there's Achilies Heel. OMG! *swoon* We'd had a major falling out and then managed to work through it and become friends again. A few weeks ago he called and we had a surpisingly long and good conversation. Yesterday, we had an all day txt conversation and the conversation started one way and ended up taking a left turn in Albuquerque with loaded guns at the firing range. Boy, was that ever one heck of a conversation; leaving Steve ready to defy anything I might say and do his own thing.
Now, I didn't bring y'all here to divulge the TMI of my personal life, I'm simply venting as a means to calm Steve down and keep his desires at bay. You see, what's also pissing Steve of is that I gave up self-gratification for Lent seeing as I really don't have any vices to speak of. I don't really drink. I don't smoke or eat really bad foods, so I figured self-gratification was something that I'd miss. Oh, and boy, do I ever miss it. Between my current dry spell since Dreadz absense and my not self-fulfilling, Steve has been wreaking havoc on my innards. He's running around inside me like a richotcheting bullet. I'm trying to be a good girl; I really am, but I really don't know how much longer I can go on.
The irony of it all is that I was celibate for over two years and pretty much didn't give it a second thought, but now I feel like a damn fiend. I guess once you let the cat out the bag (no pun intended), it's pretty hard to put it back in. *Slish, I know you're having a field day with this*. LMAO!
I'm a woman with options and will have to decide which box off the multiple choice list I'll check off. Whatever or whomever I choose, it will be exacted of clear conscious and sound mind; or what's left of it. *giggle*
Have a great weekend chillens!
Love to live; live to love!