31 October 2006

Temptation Tuesday

A list of things/thoughts we’ve all had at one point. The confidentiality clause is in effect.

…exact some form of revenge on an ex for no other reason cause you want to

…give in to that booty call

…make a booty call

…do something that is completely opposite to how people see you

…do something wild/crazy out of town because you’re out of town and no one will know

…give in the your biggest temptation

…cheat because you know you can get away with it

…call in sick knowing you just want the day off

…push up on someone just to see if you’ve still got “it”

…steal something

…change the price on something in the store

What’s your temptation today?

30 October 2006

Mischief Monday

DISCLAIMER - After succombing to peer pressure, I've decided I'd try another themed week. It's a hard task for me because thinking of unique themes stresses me, so if I change midstream, it's because I can't handle the pressure.

As some of you know, I'm at the top end of my 30s which means I should be a little more mature and congnizent of proper decorum. While I typically do behave accordingly, sometimes the little bad kid in me wants to come out and play and she made her presence known on Friday. Since then, a series of michievous thoughts have crossed my mind and I'll share them with you.

...burst the inflated pumpkin on someone's front lawn

...find a way to cut the power to an invisible fence to see if the dog would make a break for it

...crank call people posing as a bill collector or some other annoying person

...call the chinese restaurant and order Genital Chicken (General Chicken) and a Poo-Poo platter and ask if it has poop in it

...put saran wrap across a toilet and wait for someone to use it

...put tape on key holes

...create phony email addys and play tricks on friends to see what they'll say about the email
(no, I'm not responsible for any such emails you might receive)

...call a store and ask for a product is not on sale, but is at their competitors and then berate them for not having it on sale

...drive slow in the fast lane to pay back someone who's done it to me

...play some real hood music in a white neighborhood and some crazy rock music in the hood

...leave an anonymous seductive message on a stranger's voicemail

...giving in to any errant behavior that comes over me while in public

What does your inner child want to do?

27 October 2006

Fantasy/Freaky Friday

The final installment in my themed posts. Today's is a collection of fantasies and freaky things I’ve heard of or done. Unless you know me personally, you will not know which one relates to me. It’s better that way; gotta protect the innocent and the guilty.

…getting laid on a GYN’s table, by a stud muffin of a doctor

…doing it in an emergency service vehicle i.e., an ambulance, a patrol car, or a fire truck

…being fondled during a seminar

…doing it in a store’s fitting room

…skinny dipping in broad daylight

...masturbated while driving

...masturbated at work

...masturbated in front of partner, then fell asleep

…doing it at the job after hours

…having someone go down while driving a MANUAL transmission car

…role playing (she acts like a he and he like she)

...anonymous sex

...multiple partners (why won't that one ever die?)

...doing it in a church (WT???)

...same sex

...in same room while child was sleeping

...being submissive

...in any public place

...in parents car while they were in the house

...with a MILF or DILF

...in a club while dancing

...in a bar while sitting on bf's lap

Okay, I'm sure that's more than enough to share. Remember I shall not name names. Confidentiality agreemments have been signed and lawd knows I can't afford to lose the little bit I got.

Have a great weekend and don't hold me liable for any mischief you might find yourself in as a result of reading this.

26 October 2006

Throwback Thursday

Seeing as most of my readers are "grown", I think y'all can appreciate today's post.

Ever wish we could go back in time to a period where things were a little less hectic and more enjoyable? Yeah, me too, so here's my list of throwbacks I'm feeling.

...house parties where the guests didn't come empty handed

...where said guests would stay and help clean up afterward

...real music that was worth listening/dancing to

...music videos that actually went with the song

...neighbors that you knew and could trust

...kids respecting their elders

...the "village" that raised a child

...home cooked meals and eating out was a treat

...parents who attended their childrens games without becoming belligerent/violent

...parents/grandparents that acted their title and not their kids best friends

...going to church as a FAMILY

...wearing your Sunday Best

...where the parent of a child born out of wedlock was not referred to as "my baby daddy/mama"

...where having children from multiple men/women was NOT something to be proud

...Sunday dinners

...Friday fish fry's

...kids didn't carry guns, knives, bombs to school

...corner stores in neighborhoods where you could get "credit" til payday

...homemade birthday cakes

What's your throwback?

25 October 2006

Wired Wednesday

I guess I'm on a roll with these day of the week themed posts...

Ever have your headphones to the point that you completely block everything and everyone out? Even more than that, you’re so into what you’re listening to that you’re singing out loud and not realizing just how loud you are? Well, that’s been me today. I’ve had coworkers come over and say, “hey, I didn’t know you could sing.” Or, “you’re humming really loud.” To them I say, “well, now you do,” or “oh really? Oh, okay.” And kept on about my business temporarily upset over the intrusion, then return to my iPod and jam away.

At one point, I got so into the music that I was bouncing in my seat and someone stopped, backed up, and started mocking me. Lucky for them, I liked them and let it slide. Had it been someone I didn’t like, I’da said, “hata”, laughed and again, go on about my business. I know folk look at me sometimes like WTF?

On the real, I don’t give a rat’s ass cause I sit in my cube minding business having to deal with all the bullshit and drama around me, so if I decide to get a little vocal once in a while, then so be it. At least my singing or humming is less offensive. Hey, I see the faces of doubt. While I’m not Mariah, my vocals are pretty decent; I can hold a tune.

And for the inquiring minds, I’m listening to John Legend’s new CD
Once Again and if you don’t have it, I suggest you get your butts to the store
to get it. And for those who are a little dusty in the pockets, see if one of your peeps will burn you a copy of theirs. For the ladies, he’s looking kinda good, so you might want to purchase your own copy cause he’s got some good pix in the insert in addition to the lyrics. Gotta love that so you’re not singing the wrong things. (lol)

Well, that’s all from me today. Massah an n’em got me pickin hard today, so I gotta get back to the fields.

24 October 2006

Terrific Tuesday

A collection of thoughts I came to embrace as the day progressed

It's Terrific Tuesday because

...I slept well last night and woke up blessed and refreshed

...jus.b.fli wrote an amazing poem ...Between Us (for Clark) and posted it on her site

...I embrace the notion that everyone needs a "Superhero"

...I bought the new John Legend CD and love it

...although my future godchild wouldn't show its "business" on the ultra sound, we know that s/he is healthy and strong (still praying for a girl)

...had a talk with my best friend and she's in a good place right now

...feel better knowing that someone with whom I've hurt doesn't hold it against me and knows it wasn't intentional

...those whom I'm close to know I love them very much even when I don't always say it

...I still haven't apologized to my coworker because I still know it won't be sincere

...received a call from a friend who just wanted to say "hi"

...there are new readers on my site

...I found a killer poem that I wrote and had forgotten about, but am currently updating for a future post on my other page The Saphyre Lounge

...when one door closes another one opens and often with more favorable results

...for all the wonders yet to occur today

...for all the e-hugs I'm sending into the universe

23 October 2006

Monday Musings

This post is a collection of various musings.

Thinking of white men who are on my "they could get it list"
...Jon. B (singer/songwriter)
...Joshua Morrow (actor Young & the Restless)
...Robin Thicke (singer/songwriter)
...Jason Statham (actor)

Black men on my "they could get it list"
...Maxwell (singer/songwriter)
...Morris Chestnut (actor)
...Michael Jai White (actor)
...Idris Elba (actor/DJ...betcha didn't know the latter)
...Reggie Bush (NFL)

Wondering why I can't be somewhere other than on the plantation right now doing something I really want to do?

Wondering with what sincerity I'm going to apologize to a coworker for "hurting his feelings and embarassing him".

Thinking about the two Jack and Cokes I had on Saturday that almost caused me to do bad things to a good body.

Those CFMs I want but can't currently get because I'm not fully recovered from my foot surgery (damn, damn, damn!)
myspace layouts, myspace codes, glitter graphics
Anxiously awaiting word from a sponsor so we can pull off one hella party in Dec. (y'all are invited when (being optimistic) we get the confirmation)

Wondering how a sick friend is feeling.

Strolling down memory lane for no real good reason other than it's making me laugh to do it.

Thinking about the crazy conversation I had this morning with "Edie".
myspace layouts, myspace codes, glitter graphics
Wishing I was in London right now drinking tea and eating biscuits with my favorite aunt.

Already thinking about Thanksgiving dinner. (who wants to help wash/cut greens???)

Trying to gather enough Monopoly money to "bribe" someone into behaving.

Deciding to end now because I realize that I currently have entirely too much free time on my hands and should probably find something constructive to do other than blog.

19 October 2006

Negatives & Positives

In reading posts by jus.b.fli, Nikki, and a few others whom post blogs about being grateful, I chose to post one also. No, not because I'm a copy cat, but because I like the idea. My post will be a combination of things I'm thankful for and the negatives that later became positives in my life. Here goes...

I'm grateful for

...The Divine and His presence in my life

...sometimes taking chances even when I don't want to

...for the new venture the best girls a girl can have and I are taking on

...being a positive influence on people around me even then I personally think I could be hurting them by being honest

...for being given and voice/talent and using it wisely

...for using my down time constructively even though someone thinks I' m a PROUD slacker

...for the readers who take the time to read and comment to my blogs

...for allowing myself to grow and for dropping the self-deprecation

...for taking some bricks out of the wall I've built over the years

...for newly formed bonds

...for being as old as I am and looking and feeling the best I've ever been

...for embracing my age and looking forward to my next milestone birthday

...for the new baby due in March that I will be the Godmother of (pray it's a girl)

...for the twins I'm already the proud auntie of

...for Lil Lady cause even though she drives me crazy at times, is the best daughter a mother can have

...for the tears I currently feel welling in my eyes because I feel so overwhelmed with joy right now

The negatives that became positives...

...the shit I endured growing up that made me stronger and more resilient

...those who called me everything but the child of God cause I'm now beautiful inside and out

...those who said I'd only have a job and never a career; I have a career and then some

...the loves that broke my heart; miss me now don'tcha!

...the car accident that was supposed to kill me, but The Divine intervened and I'm still here

...decisions I made that seemed wrong at the time...the memories linger, but I did the RIGHT thing

...for not getting into the college of my choice, but for the wonderful experience I had at my alma mata and for the great friends I made and still have to this day

...the so-called e-friend who turned out to be an obsessive psycho cause he showed me I was too trusting and let my guard down at the wrong time in my life and it also showed that I have a caring heart and always try to find the good in people

...any negative unnamed that has turned into a positive whether I know it or not

18 October 2006

Wierd thoughts Wednesday

I had no idea what I wanted to blog about today and then this hit me.

I know it isn't just me who does this, but I wanted to through some wierd thoughts out there that have recently (and not so recently) gone through my head.

Ever wonder why the black people in soap opera's have no black friends? Is the budget that small that they can only have a limited number of black actors in the story?

Ever wish you could write the script from a more everyday point of view? That would be some soap opera!

Ever look at someone at a couple and think, "they must be a disgusting couple in the bedroom."

Ever look at your coworkers and think, if you're this much of a dick/bitch here, I wonder what you're like at home?

Ever wish you could go out and mute someone's speakerphone because you know they don't need to conduct every call via speaker?

Ever wish you could go to the loud cowoker and say, "can you please just shut the fuck up?"

Ever wonder what people are listening in their cars when they pass you and they're singing or bobbing their heads?

Ever look at someone and think, "did you even look in the mirror when you got dressed today?"

Ever just wanna slap the shit out of that kid who obviously has no hometraining?

Ever been tempted to pull the pants down of the kid with his jeans hanging off his ass?

Ever want to offer the teen girl with her pilsbury roll that she needs a longer shirt?

Okay, I'm gonna quit here cause I'm finding more and more things to question. Care to share your wierd thoughts?

17 October 2006


Men – Do you routinely practice acts of chivalry (I’m defining it as, doing things for woman that could have been taught in “charm” school or that are considered old school/traditional behavior)? Do you have a problem opening doors, being prompt, allowing the woman to go first; things of that nature?

Women – Do you routinely accept or expect this kind of behavior? Are you willing to allow the man to lead, to do kind things without thinking he has an agenda, and would you reciprocate in kind?

Why am I asking this? Well, as a strong, independent, and assertive woman, I still appreciate and sometimes expect those traditional/chivalrous values. I carry myself in a ladylike manner and expect to be treated as such. I enjoy feeling like and being treated like a lady. I still hold an appreciation for the traditional values that don’t seem to be taught in our homes and society these days. How can be expect our children to know how to act if they’re not taught?

In speaking with a man who not only routinely, but proudly treats women in a polite and respectable fashion, he advised me that some women do not like it or understand it. I looked at him like, “are you serious?” In a day and age where women are often complaining there are no real men still in the world, here one is and he’s being under appreciated. He said, there was an occasion where he took a woman to a formal function and she didn’t know how to use the various utensils. On another occasion he said, the woman he was out with asked him what he wanted/expected because he was treating her in such a nice way. Can you believe such a thing? I thought it was a shame that a woman would even think like that. But I guess it’s the times we live in where everything comes with a price.

Personally, a man who opens/holds doors, escorts me under an umbrella, had good table manners, engages in good and interactive conversation is wonderful. No, it’s not about dating or sex, it’s simply about being polite and respectable. As ladies, we should learn to accept and appreciate that there are men who still uphold these values and show him that we enjoy it. Remember it’s the simple things that carry the most weight. My brothers, please learn these things if you haven’t already and my sisters, allow a man to lead and show him you are thankful that he’s treating you like a lady and not like a bitch or ho.

16 October 2006

Sexual practices

Question: Why is it that because a woman has or wants sex toys it's because she has a poor sex life and/or she isn't fulfilled?

Whilte listening to the Michael Baisden show, the topic was Swinging Couples. Though I’m not into it as a sexual practice, I won’t knock others who do. They’re grown and in charge of whatever they decide as a couple, so who I am to say what they’re doing is wrong or a hazard to their relationship. I say, “do you; cause I’m gonna do me!”

Naturally, there are always those who have to throw stones, quote the Bible, and give their overzealous opinion on someone else’s lifestyle. They detracted from the subject for a while and began discussing women and sex toys. There were many females callers who said they have them and use them proudly. There were a few callers who said they don’t, but were curious, and there were others who said they’d never use them, as they are unnecessary. This one caller caught my ear. She ranted and raved about how if a woman needs to use a sex toy, she has an unfulfilling sex life and or her partner can’t satisfy her. Oh, you know I was all it at that point, but first let me direct your attention to one of my favorite blogs; The Mistress Lounge. Now this is a woman who is all about her game. The Mistress is a keep-it-real-no-holds-barred woman secure in herself, her sexuality, and her sexual prowess. I wish I could have called the show and told the OZC (overzealous caller) to defer to that site. In addition, The Mistress has a post Field Trip, in which she details her recent trip to a sex toy store. (An interesting read to say the least).

Anyway, back to the topic at hand. So, OZC is blabbing away about sex toys and their inefficiency when she was asked why she never used one. She said that she found no need for them and that is why there are men. The rest of the conversation went as follows (not exactly verbatim, but close)

Caller: OZC has every sexual experience she had was good?
OZC: No!
Caller: Ever been celibate; masturbated; or had an orgasm?
OZC: (offended): Don’t see the relevance of the questions.
Caller: Well, then you can’t see the reason why some women like sex toys, so stop making dictations on those who do. Using them (sex toys) doesn’t make women deviants. It allows them freedom of a (in some cases) one sided sexual experience of which they control.
OZC: But you’re excluding or substituting men.
Caller (laughing): No, it gives me what I want, when I want it. In addition, my HUSBAND bought me my first one and it’s for when I want to use it or when we want to add something extra to the experience.

They go back and forth for a few; then OZC huffs and puffs and then is let off the phone. Meanwhile I’m CTFU (cracking the fuck up) and wondering where these prudish women come from.

I’m a firm believer that unless you’re into some truly deviant shit (children, animals, necrophilia, and some other unusual perversions), then sex is whatever you want it to be, with whomever you want it to be with. Sex toys are just that…TOYS! Do we knock folk for playing X-Box, PS2, or Scrabble? Survey says no. So, I think sex toys are no exception.

*Note, this was supposed be post on Friday and called Freaky Friday, but I was busy. Hope it's still good for a Monday post?!

12 October 2006

Contingency Plans

I read a blog this morning Taboo Thursday: In Case of Emergency where the author spoke of the helicopter crash in NYC yesterday. The author made considerable sense about how we do not think of a back up plan until the disaster is already in effect.

Looking back over the years, I can recall each occasion that made me realize I needed a contingency plan. It started in college when I dated a guy who lived two hours away. I would take trips to see him banking on the idea that I’d drive back that same night and more than once I’d spend the night and would be in need of clothes etc. So, I began keeping an overnight bag in my car; the idea carried to date. During the time of seeing said bf, he moved to be closer to me, but we would still travel north. We were heading to Brooklyn during inclement weather and had to pull over to a rest area. Fortunately for us, we’d packed blankets and pillows for our stay, which came in handy for our impromptu stop. I now keep blankets/pillows in my (now bigger) ride. After suffering out the storm in 96 which shut the state down and a few other adverse weather conditions, I began keeping certain foods in the house that didn’t require much preparation if the power went out. Yes, I still do this to date. Now, that I’m even more grown up, I’ve taken it a step further and keep filled propane tanks outside, maintain a healthy supply of candles, flashlights, batteries, wet naps/wipes, etc., on hand in addition to food items that can be easily prepared or cooked outside using the propane tank with a burner attached.

Though to some it may seem excessive that I go to such lengths in both in my car and home, it’s not. It’s using common sense and knowing what can happen that keeps me prepared. I don’t want to be that person running to the store at the last minute to get items needed for adverse weather or power conditions. I DO NOT purchase a lot of dairy products or other perishables as I see many people do because they will not keep. Well, unless is mad cold and you can store them outside for a while. (lol)

For those of you who live in areas prone to adverse weather, power outages, or if you travel a lot, I suggest you start a disaster preparedness kit for your house and car. Even if you don’t live in the aforementioned, it’s still a good thing to have a contingency plan. Don’t let a disaster or adverse condition remind you.

Oh, one last thing, try to keep some cash on hand too. If the power goes out, you may not be able to use an ATM. Stash some cash in your car or in a jar at home.

Just a heads up from my lil corner of the world.

11 October 2006

Color Lines

In a country that is supposed to be a melting pot, culturally diverse, and unbiased, we all know that's a lie. In fact, we know it's so much of a lie that even within cultures skin color can make or break your acceptance. With more and more bi-racial children being born, one would think that the blending would lead to some greater acceptance, tolerance, and understanding, but it hasn't. There are still no dolls for the "beige" (bi-racial) kids; there are no magazines with pictures of girls with naturally curly or kinky hair, and there is certainly no one promoting their proudness of being bi-racial and/or bi-cultured. What's up with that? Don't these children deserve to be represented? Don't they want to see dolls, magazines, and such that they can identify with? Survey says they do.

For the most part, there are two kinds of dolls, white and black; yet the black dolls like like black versions of the white doll. Uh, something's wrong with that picture. To take things a step further, why aren't white girls offended that all their dolls like alike? They're all cookie-cutter unattainable Anglo-WASP images that even half the white girls can't emulate. Barbie is the biggest fraud of all. That heffa promotes a truly unattainable image, yet the ho makes millions off folk and no one seems to have a problem with that. I do! That aside, I'll get back to my point.

Bi-racial children deserve to be represented. They are people too and they are worthy of the same toys, books, and images that mean something to them. There is a magazine Latina, that reps the Latin girls, which I think is great, though it still mostly shows the Latinas that look like the white girls. I want to see a magazine that reps for real. I want to see the bi-racial girls and boys have someone they can say, "hey, s/he looks like me!" I want to see bi-racial actors, politicians, execs, etc., who are bi-racial stand up for all the little boys and girls who look like them or have culturally diverse backgrounds like theirs. Heritage is important and it promotes good social behavior when someone has someone else to feel a tie to.

Bi-racialism is not going away and it's not something that should be swept under the rug like a dirty little secret. It should be embraced, nurtured, and accepted. These children should not have to chose a side. They shouldnn't be forced to accept a toy that has diminished meaning to them just so they can have a toy or doll.

Finally, all races (though a utopian thought) should stop segregating within their own. Light skinned blacks are as acceptable and worthy as darker-skinned blacks. The same goes for the light and dark Hispanics, Italians, and even some whites. Truth be told (for those unaware), Blond(e) hair and blue eyes is a pigment deformity and is not the paramount standard for beauty emulation.

The rant must come to an end, but keep these words in mind, "...the color of a mans skin, is no more important than the color of his eyes..." and "...content of character...not the color of ones skin..." Those are the truths that should be self-evident and sustaining.

Stepping off my soap box now....

10 October 2006

There's always one

Loyal readers, thanks for your patience during my absense. I'm now liberated from the grips of Da Massa and am now free the land and resume my wanton ways. (snicker)

Anyway...So last week I was in a training class for 3 days. It was a nice change of pace and it was actually really a really good class(gasp!). Naturally, there was a mix of people who attended and of course there is always one who stands out from the rest. From day one; actually on sight, I didn't like this woman. She was loud, bragadocious, a know-it-all, and always had something to say. So, what if you've done this or that, what about those or us who haven't? Granted she had some valid points cause I'll give credit where it's due, but for crying out loud, why did she feel the need to dominate the entire freaking 3 days. More than once, I literally bit my tongue so I wouldn't say something I shouldn't. The power of the Divine is a marvelous thing because if not for Him, I wouldn't be talking to you all right now. I might really be out in the back fields of the plantation.

Everyday she had to center something on herself be it in the classroom or the breakroom. How she played on 6 soccer teams and was considering a 7th. How she's travelled the world and how in other countries what we're learning now is passe. Or how she was anorexic as a teen, but has since overcome it even though her mother thinks she should gain weight. (She's gained 10lbs) Big fucking deal beyah. I resigned myself to the fact that she really craves attention and is not getting it at home, so she makes these public declarations in order to make herself seem more important that she really is.

I watched the instructors cringe every time she opened her trap and I saw my classmates exastberated expressions as she deferred to herself to make her points. Readers, I'm a typically mind mannered gal who will tolerate much, but at one point, my mild manneredness turned to felonious thoughts as I plotted on ways to taint her coffee. Yes, she was that irksome.

I know you all know what I'm talking about and have experienced such a character in a meeting or similar environment a time or few. Please share your stories with me so I can dispell the thought..."Is it just me?"

03 October 2006

Just when I thought I could breathe...

Loyal readers...Just when I thought it was safe to breathe, I can't. I have to go back out to the plantation; so please forgive me for not being able to entertain you for the next few days, but know that I'll be back soon and will of course have plenty to rant n' rave about. I'm keeping notes.

PS...thanks for all the comments on the last post; they were entertaining.