In reading posts by jus.b.fli, Nikki, and a few others whom post blogs about being grateful, I chose to post one also. No, not because I'm a copy cat, but because I like the idea. My post will be a combination of things I'm thankful for and the negatives that later became positives in my life. Here goes...
I'm grateful for
...The Divine and His presence in my life
...sometimes taking chances even when I don't want to
...for the new venture the best girls a girl can have and I are taking on
...being a positive influence on people around me even then I personally think I could be hurting them by being honest
...for being given and voice/talent and using it wisely
...for using my down time constructively even though someone thinks I' m a PROUD slacker
...for the readers who take the time to read and comment to my blogs
...for allowing myself to grow and for dropping the self-deprecation
...for taking some bricks out of the wall I've built over the years
...for newly formed bonds
...for being as old as I am and looking and feeling the best I've ever been
...for embracing my age and looking forward to my next milestone birthday
...for the new baby due in March that I will be the Godmother of (pray it's a girl)
...for the twins I'm already the proud auntie of
...for Lil Lady cause even though she drives me crazy at times, is the best daughter a mother can have
...for the tears I currently feel welling in my eyes because I feel so overwhelmed with joy right now
The negatives that became positives...
...the shit I endured growing up that made me stronger and more resilient
...those who called me everything but the child of God cause I'm now beautiful inside and out
...those who said I'd only have a job and never a career; I have a career and then some
...the loves that broke my heart; miss me now don'tcha!
...the car accident that was supposed to kill me, but The Divine intervened and I'm still here
...decisions I made that seemed wrong at the time...the memories linger, but I did the RIGHT thing
...for not getting into the college of my choice, but for the wonderful experience I had at my alma mata and for the great friends I made and still have to this day
...the so-called e-friend who turned out to be an obsessive psycho cause he showed me I was too trusting and let my guard down at the wrong time in my life and it also showed that I have a caring heart and always try to find the good in people
...any negative unnamed that has turned into a positive whether I know it or not
19 October 2006
18 October 2006
Wierd thoughts Wednesday
I had no idea what I wanted to blog about today and then this hit me.
I know it isn't just me who does this, but I wanted to through some wierd thoughts out there that have recently (and not so recently) gone through my head.
Ever wonder why the black people in soap opera's have no black friends? Is the budget that small that they can only have a limited number of black actors in the story?
Ever wish you could write the script from a more everyday point of view? That would be some soap opera!
Ever look at someone at a couple and think, "they must be a disgusting couple in the bedroom."
Ever look at your coworkers and think, if you're this much of a dick/bitch here, I wonder what you're like at home?
Ever wish you could go out and mute someone's speakerphone because you know they don't need to conduct every call via speaker?
Ever wish you could go to the loud cowoker and say, "can you please just shut the fuck up?"
Ever wonder what people are listening in their cars when they pass you and they're singing or bobbing their heads?
Ever look at someone and think, "did you even look in the mirror when you got dressed today?"
Ever just wanna slap the shit out of that kid who obviously has no hometraining?
Ever been tempted to pull the pants down of the kid with his jeans hanging off his ass?
Ever want to offer the teen girl with her pilsbury roll that she needs a longer shirt?
Okay, I'm gonna quit here cause I'm finding more and more things to question. Care to share your wierd thoughts?
I know it isn't just me who does this, but I wanted to through some wierd thoughts out there that have recently (and not so recently) gone through my head.
Ever wonder why the black people in soap opera's have no black friends? Is the budget that small that they can only have a limited number of black actors in the story?
Ever wish you could write the script from a more everyday point of view? That would be some soap opera!
Ever look at someone at a couple and think, "they must be a disgusting couple in the bedroom."
Ever look at your coworkers and think, if you're this much of a dick/bitch here, I wonder what you're like at home?
Ever wish you could go out and mute someone's speakerphone because you know they don't need to conduct every call via speaker?
Ever wish you could go to the loud cowoker and say, "can you please just shut the fuck up?"
Ever wonder what people are listening in their cars when they pass you and they're singing or bobbing their heads?
Ever look at someone and think, "did you even look in the mirror when you got dressed today?"
Ever just wanna slap the shit out of that kid who obviously has no hometraining?
Ever been tempted to pull the pants down of the kid with his jeans hanging off his ass?
Ever want to offer the teen girl with her pilsbury roll that she needs a longer shirt?
Okay, I'm gonna quit here cause I'm finding more and more things to question. Care to share your wierd thoughts?
17 October 2006
Chivalry
Men – Do you routinely practice acts of chivalry (I’m defining it as, doing things for woman that could have been taught in “charm” school or that are considered old school/traditional behavior)? Do you have a problem opening doors, being prompt, allowing the woman to go first; things of that nature?
Women – Do you routinely accept or expect this kind of behavior? Are you willing to allow the man to lead, to do kind things without thinking he has an agenda, and would you reciprocate in kind?
Why am I asking this? Well, as a strong, independent, and assertive woman, I still appreciate and sometimes expect those traditional/chivalrous values. I carry myself in a ladylike manner and expect to be treated as such. I enjoy feeling like and being treated like a lady. I still hold an appreciation for the traditional values that don’t seem to be taught in our homes and society these days. How can be expect our children to know how to act if they’re not taught?
In speaking with a man who not only routinely, but proudly treats women in a polite and respectable fashion, he advised me that some women do not like it or understand it. I looked at him like, “are you serious?” In a day and age where women are often complaining there are no real men still in the world, here one is and he’s being under appreciated. He said, there was an occasion where he took a woman to a formal function and she didn’t know how to use the various utensils. On another occasion he said, the woman he was out with asked him what he wanted/expected because he was treating her in such a nice way. Can you believe such a thing? I thought it was a shame that a woman would even think like that. But I guess it’s the times we live in where everything comes with a price.
Personally, a man who opens/holds doors, escorts me under an umbrella, had good table manners, engages in good and interactive conversation is wonderful. No, it’s not about dating or sex, it’s simply about being polite and respectable. As ladies, we should learn to accept and appreciate that there are men who still uphold these values and show him that we enjoy it. Remember it’s the simple things that carry the most weight. My brothers, please learn these things if you haven’t already and my sisters, allow a man to lead and show him you are thankful that he’s treating you like a lady and not like a bitch or ho.
Women – Do you routinely accept or expect this kind of behavior? Are you willing to allow the man to lead, to do kind things without thinking he has an agenda, and would you reciprocate in kind?
Why am I asking this? Well, as a strong, independent, and assertive woman, I still appreciate and sometimes expect those traditional/chivalrous values. I carry myself in a ladylike manner and expect to be treated as such. I enjoy feeling like and being treated like a lady. I still hold an appreciation for the traditional values that don’t seem to be taught in our homes and society these days. How can be expect our children to know how to act if they’re not taught?
In speaking with a man who not only routinely, but proudly treats women in a polite and respectable fashion, he advised me that some women do not like it or understand it. I looked at him like, “are you serious?” In a day and age where women are often complaining there are no real men still in the world, here one is and he’s being under appreciated. He said, there was an occasion where he took a woman to a formal function and she didn’t know how to use the various utensils. On another occasion he said, the woman he was out with asked him what he wanted/expected because he was treating her in such a nice way. Can you believe such a thing? I thought it was a shame that a woman would even think like that. But I guess it’s the times we live in where everything comes with a price.
Personally, a man who opens/holds doors, escorts me under an umbrella, had good table manners, engages in good and interactive conversation is wonderful. No, it’s not about dating or sex, it’s simply about being polite and respectable. As ladies, we should learn to accept and appreciate that there are men who still uphold these values and show him that we enjoy it. Remember it’s the simple things that carry the most weight. My brothers, please learn these things if you haven’t already and my sisters, allow a man to lead and show him you are thankful that he’s treating you like a lady and not like a bitch or ho.
16 October 2006
Sexual practices
Question: Why is it that because a woman has or wants sex toys it's because she has a poor sex life and/or she isn't fulfilled?
Whilte listening to the Michael Baisden show, the topic was Swinging Couples. Though I’m not into it as a sexual practice, I won’t knock others who do. They’re grown and in charge of whatever they decide as a couple, so who I am to say what they’re doing is wrong or a hazard to their relationship. I say, “do you; cause I’m gonna do me!”
Naturally, there are always those who have to throw stones, quote the Bible, and give their overzealous opinion on someone else’s lifestyle. They detracted from the subject for a while and began discussing women and sex toys. There were many females callers who said they have them and use them proudly. There were a few callers who said they don’t, but were curious, and there were others who said they’d never use them, as they are unnecessary. This one caller caught my ear. She ranted and raved about how if a woman needs to use a sex toy, she has an unfulfilling sex life and or her partner can’t satisfy her. Oh, you know I was all it at that point, but first let me direct your attention to one of my favorite blogs; The Mistress Lounge. Now this is a woman who is all about her game. The Mistress is a keep-it-real-no-holds-barred woman secure in herself, her sexuality, and her sexual prowess. I wish I could have called the show and told the OZC (overzealous caller) to defer to that site. In addition, The Mistress has a post Field Trip, in which she details her recent trip to a sex toy store. (An interesting read to say the least).
Anyway, back to the topic at hand. So, OZC is blabbing away about sex toys and their inefficiency when she was asked why she never used one. She said that she found no need for them and that is why there are men. The rest of the conversation went as follows (not exactly verbatim, but close)
Caller: OZC has every sexual experience she had was good?
OZC: No!
Caller: Ever been celibate; masturbated; or had an orgasm?
OZC: (offended): Don’t see the relevance of the questions.
Caller: Well, then you can’t see the reason why some women like sex toys, so stop making dictations on those who do. Using them (sex toys) doesn’t make women deviants. It allows them freedom of a (in some cases) one sided sexual experience of which they control.
OZC: But you’re excluding or substituting men.
Caller (laughing): No, it gives me what I want, when I want it. In addition, my HUSBAND bought me my first one and it’s for when I want to use it or when we want to add something extra to the experience.
They go back and forth for a few; then OZC huffs and puffs and then is let off the phone. Meanwhile I’m CTFU (cracking the fuck up) and wondering where these prudish women come from.
I’m a firm believer that unless you’re into some truly deviant shit (children, animals, necrophilia, and some other unusual perversions), then sex is whatever you want it to be, with whomever you want it to be with. Sex toys are just that…TOYS! Do we knock folk for playing X-Box, PS2, or Scrabble? Survey says no. So, I think sex toys are no exception.
*Note, this was supposed be post on Friday and called Freaky Friday, but I was busy. Hope it's still good for a Monday post?!
Whilte listening to the Michael Baisden show, the topic was Swinging Couples. Though I’m not into it as a sexual practice, I won’t knock others who do. They’re grown and in charge of whatever they decide as a couple, so who I am to say what they’re doing is wrong or a hazard to their relationship. I say, “do you; cause I’m gonna do me!”
Naturally, there are always those who have to throw stones, quote the Bible, and give their overzealous opinion on someone else’s lifestyle. They detracted from the subject for a while and began discussing women and sex toys. There were many females callers who said they have them and use them proudly. There were a few callers who said they don’t, but were curious, and there were others who said they’d never use them, as they are unnecessary. This one caller caught my ear. She ranted and raved about how if a woman needs to use a sex toy, she has an unfulfilling sex life and or her partner can’t satisfy her. Oh, you know I was all it at that point, but first let me direct your attention to one of my favorite blogs; The Mistress Lounge. Now this is a woman who is all about her game. The Mistress is a keep-it-real-no-holds-barred woman secure in herself, her sexuality, and her sexual prowess. I wish I could have called the show and told the OZC (overzealous caller) to defer to that site. In addition, The Mistress has a post Field Trip, in which she details her recent trip to a sex toy store. (An interesting read to say the least).
Anyway, back to the topic at hand. So, OZC is blabbing away about sex toys and their inefficiency when she was asked why she never used one. She said that she found no need for them and that is why there are men. The rest of the conversation went as follows (not exactly verbatim, but close)
Caller: OZC has every sexual experience she had was good?
OZC: No!
Caller: Ever been celibate; masturbated; or had an orgasm?
OZC: (offended): Don’t see the relevance of the questions.
Caller: Well, then you can’t see the reason why some women like sex toys, so stop making dictations on those who do. Using them (sex toys) doesn’t make women deviants. It allows them freedom of a (in some cases) one sided sexual experience of which they control.
OZC: But you’re excluding or substituting men.
Caller (laughing): No, it gives me what I want, when I want it. In addition, my HUSBAND bought me my first one and it’s for when I want to use it or when we want to add something extra to the experience.
They go back and forth for a few; then OZC huffs and puffs and then is let off the phone. Meanwhile I’m CTFU (cracking the fuck up) and wondering where these prudish women come from.
I’m a firm believer that unless you’re into some truly deviant shit (children, animals, necrophilia, and some other unusual perversions), then sex is whatever you want it to be, with whomever you want it to be with. Sex toys are just that…TOYS! Do we knock folk for playing X-Box, PS2, or Scrabble? Survey says no. So, I think sex toys are no exception.
*Note, this was supposed be post on Friday and called Freaky Friday, but I was busy. Hope it's still good for a Monday post?!
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