I don’t want to turn this post into a male bashing one, but I may not be able to help myself. Now, I’m not going to suggest that all my bruthas are this way, but from what I’ve seen and experienced lately, it seems like a great number need a refresher course on chivalry and gentleman like behavior.
Let me start with the guy who pushed his way through the door when I was clearly there before him and when I said, “excuse you”, he just huffed and continued on. Meanwhile, shortly thereafter I was leaving the store and a white man held the door for me. While walking into the plantation, a white man held the door even though I was a fair distance from it, greeted me with a pleasant smile, and wished me a good day. A few days thereafter, a guy who’s clearly seen and spoken to me on several occasions, refused to hold the door for me as I struggled with two bags and a cup of coffee. I was like “WTF?” On my date a couple weekends ago, I noticed I was walking on the outside of the street, brought it to his attention, and he said, “well, there’s no cars coming.” WTF? Again! First of all, he should’ve have been aware of his presence and acted accordingly and when it was brought to his attention, he should have simply said, “my bad” and corrected himself.
What’s really going on these days? Are women no longer worthy of being treated well or like ladies? Would these very same men be pissed if someone treated their mothers, aunts, grandmothers, or sisters in the same fashion they’re treating women? I highly doubt it. It’s a sad state of affairs when chivalry 101 isn’t being acted upon.
As a mother, I never let my child walk on the outside of the street or trail behind me. It’s my role as a mother to be protective, just as I feel it’s a man’s role to be that way toward children.
I’d hate to think that “we” have lost touch with the simple things in life and forgotten how to just be polite in the most general of ways. Conversely, I have had instances where I’ve been treated with the respect and chivalry I deserve and always extend the appropriate and applicable courtesies.
Ladies and gentlemen we must teach our children the foundation of good manners, courtesy, and appropriate male/female exchange. We must reinforce the value and importance of treating each other well and not allow common courtesy and decency to fall by the wayside. This past weekend, I saw my cousin teaching his little brother the basics of how to treat a young lady and it was impressive to see how he educated him on the importance being a good young man and doing the right thing.
I think we all need to do more to exact the basics of human kindness and polite exchange. And when we have a negative experience with someone, I think we should find ways to bring it to their attention in hopes of bettering them for the next time. We can not and should not condone or make excuses for poor behavior and the ill treatment of others.
Each one; teach one and pay it forward!