Okay, someone help me understand (if you can), why is it when we find out someone we know/knew is gay, that we suddenly have to form an opinion about it?
Here's why i'm asking. So, last week, a friend sends me an email telling me about an old high school friend whom he at one time "suspected" was gay and recently found out it was true. This is bits and pieces of what he had to say..."...finally get in touch with an old junior high school and high school classmate...emails me that her "partner" and her have an 18 yr old daughter... always wondered but never knew that she liked to licky, licky, licky...conflicted in my own beliefs...don't condone her life style; however, it is her choice and she must live it."
I must admit, I was rather put off by his comment. I mean, why should what they be of conflict to him? In addition, he made it seem as though her choice was offensive. Am I the only one who sees it that way?
Personally, I've never had an issue with the sexuality of someone else. I mean, why should I? It's of no consequence to me, they're not hurting me, and basically, it's none of my business. I have gay friends and I don't pry into their sexual habits or comment on it. I have a transgendered friend whom I absolutely adore and she is one of my best and dearest friends. Barring an occasion here or there when a lesbian has made an overly aggressive pass at me, I've never been offended by gays. I treated the pass as I would a man and went on about my business.
What happens in their lives or communities is pretty much similar to what happens in a hetrosexual community with the exception of the flags; seeing as hetrosexuals don't have a banner or flag to announce their orientation. I must admit, that is the one thing that kind of struck me as off, but again, I'm not offended by it.
So, back to what I don't get. Why would someone be "conflicted in their beliefs" because of the lifestyle of another? That's like me saying, I'm conflicted over someone's race or religion. I mean, come on already. With so many people being water-tight-like-a-ducks-ass it's no wonder why there are so many men (and women) on the DL (down-low). Why do we have to make what others do our business? I admit, I've gotten caught up in my fair share of gossip on this matter and other matters, but it's on that premise and maturity that I realize it has nothing to do with me. As long as my sexuality is respected, then I respect anyone else's.
I'm sure each of us has our thoughts on the matter and it's usually tends to be for religious reasons, but let me pump your brakes right there, because we all KNOW that there are many in the church who are gay. We also know that God made each of us so we can't go around judging folk. In addition, there are many gay couples whose relationships have outlasted many straight people's. We all need to practice some understanding and tolerance the same way blacks, Jews, women; and so son want it. Is that really too much to ask?
So, in closing, I go back to my intro. "I don't get it!"