05 December 2006

Tally It Up and Title it..."My Fine Is..."

Okay, I'm feeling a little silly today. I got this from someone and thought it might be something fun to post. Tis the season to be jolly, so here's my contribution to bringing some humor to your life. Feel free to use this on your own sites as I'm all for spreading love and humor.
By the way, you don't need to reveal what your "crimes" were; just how much they cost you.

Smoked pot $10
Done acid $20
Ever had sex at church (you're going to hell) $25
Woke up in the morning and did not know the person who was next to you $40
Had sex with someone on MySpace $25
Had sex with a Blogger $30
Had sex for money $100
Ever had sex with a Puerto Rican $20
Vandalized something $20
Had sex on your parents' bed (just wrong) $100
Beat up someone $20
Been jumped $10
Crossed dressed (Halloween excluded) $10
Given money to stripper $25
Been in love with a stripper $20
Kissed some one who's name you didn't know $5
Hit on some one of the same sex while at work $15
Ever drive drunk $50
Ever got drunk at work, or went to work while still drunk $50
Used toys while having sex $30
Got drunk, passed and don't remember the night before $20
Went skinny dipping $15
Had sex in a pool $20
Kissed someone of the same sex $10
Had sex with someone of the same sex $20
Cheated on your significant other $10
Masturbated $10
Cheated on your significant other with their relative or close friend $20
Done oral $15
Got oral $10
Done / got oral in a car while it was moving $25
Stole something $10
Had sex with someone in jail $25
Made a nasty home video $15
Had a threesome $50
Had sex in the wild $20
Been in the same room while someone was having sex $25
Stole something worth over more than a hundred dollars $80
Had sex with someone 10 years older $20
Had sex with someone under 21 and you are over 27 $25
Been in love with two people or more at the same time $50
Said you love someone but didn't mean it $25
Went streaking $5
Went streaking in broad daylight $15
Been arrested $55
Spent time in jail $75
Peed in the pool $5
Played spin the bottle $10
Done something you regret $40
Had sex with your best friend $20
Had sex with someone you work with at work $25
Had anal sex $80
Lied to your mate $25
Lied to your mate about the sex being good $75



BluJewel said...

My fines = $650

Tiffany said...

$415. But I'm happy to pay, because some of the things I got fined for are a whole lot of fun. ;-)

Hawa said...

So here I was, thinking I'd have a small ticket. After reviewing my colorful past... twice... my fine came to exactly $500.

If I had to add fines for each time I committed some acts, I'd have to pay around $1,050 (plus the cost of stuff not included based on denial) LOL

Anonymous said...


After seeing BluJewel's fine I don't feel sooo bad.


What is Had sex in the "wild" mean? I assumed it meant "outside" and then wrote the ticket.


Anonymous said...

$925. I knew I was a gonner half-way through the survey. That doesn't even count the multiples of things. LOL

Daver said...


There are definitely some aberrations in those fine areas.
$1195. Do they take checks?

Daver said...

I'm also going to assume that we're talking over the course of one's life, right? Because I've been reaaaally good lately :)

chele said...


Wendy said...

645- It wasn't me!

jus.b.fli said...

you know what? i don't really think this post is for sweet, innocent me since my fines would be like... ZERO DOLLARS; however, i did want to say hello and let you know that i was here!! (hehehe)

Love you!


Terry said...

I need to get out more.

Anonymous said...

650!? What the fuck, awwww, i'm telling. You've been very bad blue. I am officially stamping you on the naughty list.

T.C. said...

My fine is $385...

Anonymous said...

I thought I was bad until I realized that I am not as bad as I wanted to be. My fine is only $420

BluJewel said...

Tiff - i'm happy to read that you're not as good as i thought you were and trust me that is a compliment.

hawa - lol @ u for offering to double your fine for multiple offenses.

jenelly - yes the wild equates to outside...lmao that you have openly admitted one of your "crimes"

bz - you beat my score which means you and i have a lot in common. maybe we should compare notes offline...snicker!

daver - from what i've read on your blogs, i know you fine should be high. there are no take backs so be thankful that you've been reaaaaally good lately

chele - i like that...offer up the fine with no commentary...smart woman

wendy - if not you,then who? does this mean you're the victim of identity fraud? lmao!

jus - girl, don't make me slap the lies out your mouth. you better get back here and tally up

Terry - i gotta say i'm disappointed. maybe you need to hang with bz & me so we can get you into some fun/trouble

nique - i'm sorry to shock you, but yeah, your girl can be rather nautghty

t.c - with a low fine like that, it was wise to tally up and be out...lol. like Terry you need to hang out with bz and me

org - nah, you're certainly not as bad as you wanna be, so i'm extending my offer to get into trouble with bz and me to you too.

ALL - this has been one of the funniest post i've ever done and the comments are even better. please feel free to use this on your own sites for people who aren't familiar with mine. You'll get to learn a lot about your friends/readers

BluJewel said...

one more thing...the grand total = $1,575.

daver is currently leading the pack with $1,195

Anonymous said...

My total is $220

I am boring, LOL

Susan Abraham said...

Must I confess?
It looks like I'm a bloody prude.

Freak Magnet said...

How much do I get for telling my ex the sex DID suck?

Daver said...

^----- I'm The Winrar!


First of all I'd like to thank my morally ambigous nature. Without you, I would have had a conscience, and not much of this would have been possible.

I'd also like to thank whoever made this little survey and made sweet little things like having butt sex in your parents bed while tripping face on acid and being stoned to the bejeezus a whopping $210 fine.

Thank you!

blaqrayne said...

Wow, I feel like a wild person and you know I'm really not, but anyway my fine is $930.

BluJewel said...

w.o.t.m - WHATTTTTT? (said like lil john) and you went to college????

su - only you know for sure cause you didn't post your total

freak - you should get fines deducted for telling him that. hilarious!

daver - there is absolutely NO hope for you son!

Rayne - OMFG! you beat me and I know I've done some crazy ish. WOW!!!

Anonymous said...

That's me calling the official receivers to declare myself bankrupt then! ;)

G. Mo said...

My fines = $1,025

I've done a lil' too much...

alj238 said...

Hmm Life is funny when you think back on it! Some things you cringe about, Others, you Snicker...Only $580

Anonymous said...

$85-and some of that stuff I counted TWICE. Man I am stuck in a box:-(

BluJewel said...

Lehane - i'm not sure if i'm surprised by this declaration or not!

g-mo - yeah, you've done damn near errythang!

alj238 - yeah, seems like you're at the crossroads

debo - what a sheltered life you've led. Those of us with fines over $650 are gonna get together and help you out...lol!

jc said...

I looked at this list and was like, yeah this'll be easy. There's only a FEW things I haven't done on this list.

Total = $1,095