28 September 2006

Back From The Plantation

Hi, my name is Kizzy Kimbo an dun jus come back from da plantation werr i dun werk't real hard awl week. Pleez cuse ma dicshun whiles i's tryna stop Harpo from wannin to beat me cause he food ain't ready. T'ain't ma fawlt really cuz i been werkin real hard to make dat minimum wage...LMAO!

Okay, all jokes aside...Yeah, I really am tired as hell and I do feel like I've been working harder than hookers when the sailors come to port. Man, this has been a hella week. To add more intensity to my already stressed week, I had a few incidents that needed immediate attention. You know the kind that cost unexpected amounts of money. (sigh) Oh well, I'm still living and breathing.

Now, you'd think with a week like the one I've had, the stress of it all is what would have me a tad pissed off right? Wrong! What has me ticked is my nosey ass fucking coworkers who can't mind their damn business to save their lives. On at least three separate occasions were my personal conversations listened to, I received unsolicited commentary. WTF??? Thoughts in progress at the time...
1) Why can't you respect the fact that I WASN'T talking to you and MY business is just that?
2) If I wanted your opionon, unsolicited advice, or your general 2 cents, I could have frickin given it to you or asked for it. (neither was the damn case)
3) If you're not a part of the solution, then you're a part of the problem.

It was at that very moment where I said to myself IS IT JUST ME?

I sit in a damn cubicle and you all know that you get minimal privacy at best. When speaking with others in my cube it's a given that we speak in a hushed tones as not to alert the nosies. And if I'm on the phone, I speak lowly to prevent the said nosies from being all in. That works sometimes, but it's not always easy for the other party to hear me or think they haven't mistaken me for a Girl Six and I'm maxing out their credit card with sexy diatribe. (that wouldn't be a bad side hustle though...tick, tock, tick tock....thoughts in motion...lol!)

I came dangerously close to blazing a said nosie's ass today because he was all in mine like he and I had been in conversation about a particular incident I was dealing with. The Divine is truly wonderful because it not for Him, it would have gotten a tad ugly.

Well, I'm home now and am making the most of my evening and looking forward to NOT having to get up at o' dark thirty to get ready to for my day on the plantation.

25 September 2006

Friendship 101

What is Friendship?

I’m sure all of you have friends whom you hold in high regard and that there’s nothing you wouldn’t do for them. Well, what happens when said friend no longer treats you in kind? A close friend and I have been discussing this a lot lately and we’ve mutually concluded that there are several people in our respective lives that have or will lose their ranking and be placed on the Do Not Call list. Why? Because while we recognize that people grow and change and their lives become more filled, is it really that hard to pick up a phone to or send an email to say, “I know it’s been a while, but I just wanted to check in and say hi”. Refer to Maintaining Friendships. To add insult to existing injury, the offending party is the one who uses that confounded line “what’s up stranger? Ain’t heard form you in a minute!” WTF?? Immediately screams in my mind. Are they freaking serious? Me? The stranger? Yeah, the fuck right!!!! I’m the one who’s been reaching out, taking the back seat, ride or die; and what have you. And you have the nerve to finally make contact and greet me with the okey doke. I don’t friggin think so!!!!!!!!!

Just because someone has been a friend for ex amount of years doesn’t give them the right/privilege of treating someone as if they’re entitled to maintaining said status if they’re not doing anything reciprocal. Relationships of any kind are founded on reciprocity, mutual trust, respect and COMMUNICATION. How and why should I consider someone a friend if they’re not doing their part? The irony of it is that the non-reciprocal party typically expects the giving party to be there at their beck and call. In the infamous words of Ms. Houston, “hell to da naw!” Why should they hold a title to something they’ve no longer earned or deserve?
Refer to Toxic Friends

As a part of my new year’s resolutions, I concluded that I will no longer make excuses for the behavior (sometimes lack thereof) of others and take a step back. Why should I be the one constantly making contact, reaching out, and oft times be left in the deficit? If I mean/t anything to said friend, then why can’t they show me that?

Like respect, friendship is something that is EARNED, not given, and certainly NOT taken and/or taken for granted.

21 September 2006

Thoughtful Thursday p.2

A couple weeks ago, I posted (Thoughtful Thursday-Stop Whining and Live) about being thankful for our lives and the people in it. I also challenged that we keep a journal for a week and everyday write down at least 5 things that we were thankful for, things that were positive, or that made a difference in our day. The challenge was set up to show us that not everything in our lives is as bad as we think and there is plenty to be thankful for. I realized more than ever that there were so many things and people that I was thankful for and the simple things that I’ve always enjoyed meant that much more to me.

Today I have a few things I’d like to openly share…

First and foremost to the Creator in whom I have implicit faith and know the He’ll make a way for me even in spite of myself and my misgivings.
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My ride or die friends and family that mean the world to me and aren’t afraid to put me in check, show me love, and be there for me.
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You, the readers of this blog who continue to read, inspire, and encourage me to pursue my dream to become published.
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The beautiful life that God gave me the day he made me a parent. She is the best gift I’ve ever received and looking into her eyes teaches me everyday how to appreciate and value life.
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Though life hasn’t always been kind, I’ve managed to overcome so many things and can still smile, be positive, and know that my blessings are because I walked when I could have stumbled and refused to quit.
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For those of you who took that challenge, can you either email what you’d like to share to me at blujewel@comcast.net or post some of them in your comments.

20 September 2006

I've heard enough!

Raise your hands if you know someone who knows they have severe issues and does nothing about it aside from bitching and whining how it’s not their fault or how they don’ t know what to do to resolve it.

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I’ve been listening to a woman at work go on daily tirades about her life and the people in it. To hear her tell it, you’d think the woman was Mother Theresa though. Each day, I hear her make disparaging remarks about everyone and how they’re at fault for this, that, and the third, yet while she knows she’s partly to blame for not saying anything; it’s still NOT her fault. She has a hip problem, but won’t remain in therapy to heal it. She doesn’t like her car, but won’t trade it for something else because it’s paid for. Her son has a girlfriend he won’t bring home and spends a lot of time either with her or with her friends. Hubby travels a lot, but makes tons of money, so “I guess I’ll just have to accept it.” (quoting her). Shit like this goes on and on and could give the Energizer Bunny, Lance Armstrong, and the (now defunct) Concord a run for their money.

Earlier today she whined about the neighbors kid who uses her pool as a part of his daily exercise routine. “Does he have to start so early or use it so late?” She whined to her coworker. Meanwhile she’s given him permission to use it. “That light is very bright when I’m trying to sleep”, she went on. Of course my smart-ass remark (to myself) was, then just tell the damned kid that he either has to adjust his times or not use the pool. Not more than ten seconds later, her coworker says damn near what I said. I guess my telepathic rays were in full effect at that moment. Now, one would think she might consider what was being said right? Wrong! Double; triple wrong. This woman commenced to now make excuses citing that “…he needed to exercise…that he was doing something constructive, and that it was for the greater good.” WTF right? EXACTLY WHAT I WAS THINKING!!!
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I decide to rid my mind of this annoying and whining woman and mind my own business, but how the hell can I when she talks so damn loud. ARGH!! So, again, I’m listening to the heffa whine, and now she’s going on about how she wants to do more with her time, but he has to take care of her husband and son. (Remember though…hubby travels a lot and son is a super geek who’s hardly home). So, you tell me who the hell is she taking care of? The cat? Nooo…it’s out trolling the neighborhood and getting knocked up cause she thinks it’s inhumane to have it spayed and keep it inside. “Cats are supposed to have the freedom of going in or out”. Yes, the heffa has said that.

Readers, I’m surprised I don’t have a hearing problem for 1) having to listen to her self-effacing tirades and the whining that will probably go on for all perpetuity, or 2) for how loud I sometimes listen to the music in my ear buds. Whichever deafens me first will surely be her fault and then I’ll file a petty lawsuit against her for wrongful termination of my hearing acuities and have her tied up in litigation for a while and show her what she really has to complain about. That’ll learn her.

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19 September 2006

Delusions of Grandeur

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Every so often, I come across someone who swears the world revolves around them, that they do no wrong, and that their way is the only way. While I’m sure in their world that’s probably the case, but in the real world, such delusions of grandeur can be construed as misguided arrogance, conceit, and an unhealthy lack of humility. If this person were under 25, I might accept their logic as a simple case of immaturity, but if said person is over 30, educated, seasoned, and has been exposed to the real world, I’m left wondering in which parallel universe do they reside? Let’s be for real here, it’s simply not about you and you’re really not as important as you think you are.

Fantasy #1: The need to defer back to their youth or how hard they are when they want to exert their credibility.

Reality: If you have to constantly bring this up, then you actually haven’t matured enough. You also have NOT manned/womaned up at all. In fact, you’re SoS (stuck on stupid).

Fantasy #2: Everything is about them.

Reality: Huh? What? Are you serious? Give me a fucking break. It's this simple…YOU ARE NOT ALL THAT! If you have to constantly praise yourself, then it’s not really praise is it? Self-praise shows a depravity in your psyche and your constant need to do this in order to appear larger than life is pathetic and redundant.

Fantasy #3: Marginalizing others or believing their own hype.

Reality: Self-explanatory; though I will say that those who conform to this state of being are typically alone and rather lonely in their existence. In addition, the company they keep tends to be of a lesser caliber characteristically than the individual. This is done in order to out shine their company and again present themselves to be "better".

Fantasy #4: Everyone needs someone like them in their life.

Reality: Yes, to some degree we all do need someone to who is of that caliber so we can see what is not necessary bullshit to put up with. So, thanks for being so fucking ignorant, arrogant, and self-serving.

Fantasy #5: The need to control and belabor a point.

Reality: Uhm, do you really think that others have that much time and energy to argue with you? Nah, doubt it! In fact, I’d rather go toe-to-toe with the Energizer Bunny cause I can at least take the damned battery out to stop it. With someone so delusional, they never tire of themselves and can only be stopped if insulted (providing they pay attention enough to know they were); if you concede to their incessant yapping because while you probably know you’re right, it’s easier that way; and/or if you can't do anything to shut them the fuck up.
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This is merely a small sampling of what I, and maybe some of you encounter in your life. I’ve come to the conclusion that it’s for the greater good to avoid and/or limit contact with said individuals as much as possible since homicide is still illegal (dammit) in all 50 states.

18 September 2006

Happy New Year!!

Your girl is back, although later than I anticipated. (lol) My new year was brought in rather nicely and I lived to tell (barely) of the fun I had. Thanks again to my girls who helped me "act up". Refer to (you'll have to scroll down on the page) Less Than Honorable Intentions for a peep at what my night was like. Well, it didn't end as drastically as the poem details, but there was a certain someone who decided to get "intimate" with me.

Anyhoo, my birthday celebrations went well and I look forward to my new year. Thanks again to all of you who posted your well wishes; that was truly special and much appreciated.

I currently have a few things on my mind to discuss, though I can't post in detail right now. However, be prepared for some "straight, no chaser" blogs. BluJewel is on a mission this year and The Gem With The Pen has big dreams and plans to shine.

12 September 2006

Heads up!

I'm now one day away from my new year and I'm very excited! Though I didn't accomplish a couple of the things I planned to to close out this year, I still feel good about what I've done. As I look back, I see how much I've grown and how much I've changed; as well as the parts of me that have remained the same. I've done some much needed closet cleaning (literally & metaphorically) and will enter my new year lighter, freer, and with the vigor of a juggernaut, with a little less destruction though.

My new year celebration will begin tonight and run into the wee hours of 9/13, so there will be no blog entry tomorrow. Thank you all for your support, comments, and company during this year, and I look forward to seeing you all on 9/14.

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To MEEEEEEEEEEE!

11 September 2006

In Rememberance of 9/11

As I remember where I was, what I was doing, and whom I was with on September 11th, 2001, I not only pause to give a respectful moment to those who died, but for those who survived because none of us were unaffected by that day. The FDNY will forever be immortalized for their heroism, selflessness, and dedicated service, as will the other men and woman who volunteered their time, talents, and service. However, ladies and gentlemen, let us not forgot those still fighting the effects of 9/11; the thousands of service members called to active duty as a result of that day; many of whom are still activated. The lives of many men and women; some not even legally able to drink were called to service to fight so-called War on Terrorism.

Though I'm not going to get into a political tirade about who did what and who's profiting from this alleged "war", I will digress and say while we can't always believe the press, I think the stats speak for themselves More Americans blame Bush for 9/11. Though it really doesn't take a CNN top story for many of us (including those who voted for the pres) to realize that a gargantuan disservice has been done to this country and the people. In addition, having known many who are or were deployed as a result of that fatefull day, the effects are still very real and still on-going. So, as we reflect on 9/11 specifically, please reflect on those still "at war".

08 September 2006

Shut the )%*$*% up already

This thought crosses my mind every time certain people speak and I'm being too polite to speak my mind. A particular co-worker evokes this in me daily. Who comes to mind for you? (Names can be changed to protect their sorry behinds...lol)

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07 September 2006

Thoughtful Thursday - Stop whining and live

It’s human nature to whine and/or complain about something be it the weather, finances, spouses, children, work, or whatever, yet how often do we speak about something positive? Probably not that often and we should work toward changing that.

As we marked the 1-year anniversary (Aug 29th) of Katrina and as we approach the 5-year anniversary of 9/11, we should all look at ourselves and how fortunate we are. Even the smallest thing that may seem inconsequential could be the one thing that separates us from having nothing. The friend who treats you to lunch when you have no money, the coffee being fresh in the break room, the traffic lights all being in your favor while you’re running late. Always remember there is joy in the simple things! Looking at the big picture, we often fail to see the smaller and most significant details. Slow down and really live, love, and laugh.

The following is a clear reminder of how we can reposition ourselves:

The happiness of your life depends on the quality of your thoughts.
You have power over your mind – not outside events.
Your life is what your thoughts make it.

For one week, I challenge you to keep a journal and everyday write down 5 things you’re happy about, thankful for, or any other positive occurrence. At the end of the week, review the journal and you’ll see that things aren’t as bad as perceived and while doing that you’ll grow a better appreciation for yourself, your life, and the people in it. If that doesn’t occur, then pull out an AK47 and kill the lot of them. I’M ONLY KIDDING ON THAT. I just said it because I know there’s always at least one skeptic in the group. (lol)

Have a blessed day!
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06 September 2006

Mother's baby, Daddy's maybe

This is a long overdue rant, so be prepared for quite a tirade (though abridged).

WHY? WHY? WHY? Why am I pissed? Cause I’m sick of hearing some effin woman call into a radio show or appear on TV trying to find out who her “baby daddy” is. If you’re gonna sleep with that many men, would it behoove the hoe (yes, I called her that and I ain’t taking it back) to use protection? I’m sure it’s less embarrassing than putting your business out in the open that you’ve screwed so many men that you can’t figure out which one fathered your child. Woman like that bring out the proverbial sailor in me. As I listen to them try to justify their dilemma, I’m screaming at the radio or TV calling them all sorts of names. I’m really not trying to be judgmental, but it’s hard not to be. Condoms are so easy to come by it’s not even funny. Hell, you can go to your local gas station bathroom and find them. Woman can purchase over-the-counter birth control that does work. The combination of the two works even better. Okay, I’ll give it that some of the encounters could be impulsive, but as I said, condoms (if nothing else) are so damned easy to come by and why would she even want to risk getting pregnant by someone whose name she barely knows? Dammit! I’m soooo effin sick of it.

To flip the story and calm down a little, I now digress to the women who cheat on their boyfriends or husbands, get pregnant, and try to pawn the child of at theirs. WTF? How wrong is that? If you’re gonna cheat, at least be a smart cheat. The quickest and sure fired way to get caught is to get pregnant. Some men can and will do the math to know whether it’s his or not. Some men might question it on the grounds that having a child yet wasn’t something that was discussed. Imagine Male #1 has loved and raised this child since birth and at four years old his “daughter” gets sick and he finds out at that point that he’s not the child’s father. Imagine Male #2. You meet a woman, start dating, and within a short time she’s pregnant. You’re warned to take a DNA test upon the child’s birth because you barely know the woman and you live is opposing ends of the state. Male #2 is in denial because he so wants to have a child. Two years later, Male #2 finally takes the DNA test to find out his “son” is not his. Yes, I know men this happened to. If I had been either of them, I’d have f*cked her up after I got over the shock of it.

This is wrong beyond wrong. It’s a cruel thing to do to the man and an even crueler thing to do to the child. What if the woman never finds out who the father is? What if her child ends up with a medical issue that can only be explained if the father’s medical history was available? There are so many “what ifs?” to come up with; the biggest one being what if the woman wasn’t being so damned stupid and selfish and either 1) opted to use protection, or 2) opted to use wiser judgment in sleeping with that many men in the first place. I’m sure you’ve all seen or heard of the woman who went on the Maury Povich show at least three times bringing about 15 men on trying to determine paternity. How crazy is that? Three visits, 15 men, and you still haven’t got a winner. What the hell does that say about the woman? I recall what I said, but it would be really unladylike and close to violating FCC rules for me to repeat it.

Whatever the case is, cheating isn’t the ideal thing to do while already in a committed relationship, but cheating and not using something is beyond stupid. I’m not gonna sit on a morality pedastal and say I haven’t messed around with someone else’s man (back in the day) cause I have, but I was sure as hell made sure I/we were protected. I didn’t want to put either of in a position to have to decide on whether or not to keep or terminate. Screw that! In addition, that’s one hella slap in the face to the woman who’s being cheated on that not only did your man cheat; they got pregnant. Nah, I know I was wrong for what I did, but shit, I wasn’t gonna compound it.

I must end now or this could be even longer than it already is, but I had to finally get this out.

05 September 2006

Tormented Tuesday


I survived Labor Day weekend and it actually wasn’t quite as bad as I anticipated it to be. Refer to F*ck You Friday for my diatribe on what I thought it would be like, although some of what I mentioned did in fact occur. Anyhoo, I really have nothing of any importance to rant and rave about today. My favorite Bloggers (Nikki, Miss(ed) Manners, WLSW - and the rest of you heathens to name a few!!) haven't posted today and I feel like a crack'ead feenin for my next fix. PLEASE POST SOON!!!! In addition, I’m in an ambiguous place right now and was surfing the Net and came across a wonderful video that partially speaks for me. Check it out and enjoy.

01 September 2006

F*ck You Friday!!!

This being Labor Day weekend and the last official weekend of the summer, many people are trying to get one last hurrah in before they go back to school, back to work, end a summer romance, or clean and pack up their vacation homes. For those of us who live near the shore, we endure a special kind of people every summer and Labor Day weekend brings out the ugly in them. Top ten reasons (not in any particular order of relevancy) why I'm calling it F*ck You Friday...

1. Ernesto is beating up the coast with heavy winds and rain ruining cookouts, outdoor activities, and dumping on us because he can.

2. (for the women) Those us who have hair appointments today will have our hair ruined because it's going to rain like the freaking dickens. (Ernesto, you bastard!)

3. The out-of-towners will drive like shit to get out of town causing road rage in their wake.

4. The no smoking ban in NJ will be ignored tonight because there's a One Love (Reggae) Festival at House of Blues in Atlantic City and the weed smokers will ignore it with security doing nothing about it.

5. Moms of every demographic will be in the mall this weekend doing their last minute back to school shopping and will f*ck you up if you get in their way, take the shirt they wanted for little Suzy or Johnny, or have not had enough Valium.

6. Store workers unhappy that they have to work this weekend will likely take their pissy attitudes out on you while you shop or check out.

7. The Labor Day weekend sales will have items in their flyers they wont have in the store, pulling the old bait and switch to force you into purchasing something else and/or spending more than you planned to.

8. Back to Ernesto again, because he’s on an unrelenting mission up the coast, those who cannot cookout will look for open restaurants to eat at, thus causing unexpected mayhem in their wake.

9. There’ll be chaos on the roads as vacationers head home early or are forced to evacuate and they’ll swear the roads were made just for them, so “get the f*ck outta my way” will be the catch phrase for the day.

10. The movies (for those who get cabin fever) will be packed primarily with kids who have nothing better to do than act the fool because it’s the last weekend before school starts and they need to get the summer madness out of their system.

Well, that’s my explanation of F*ck You Friday. I hope you all have a wonderful Labor Day weekend wherever you are.