18 January 2006

Refusing sex!

"Men/Women...have you ever refused sex?" When I read that on the BV message board I thought I was gonna choke from laughing. I couldn't believe someone actually posted that thread. Let's be for real okay. What man in his right mind ever refuses sex; even if it's bad? Of course that was one of the similar responses I found as I scrolled through the sea of comments. For the most part, sex is sex to a man regardless of what the woman looks like; unless there is a salvagable north in his moral compass that will redirect him elsewhere. I wanna hear from the man who has one of those compasses because he is truly an anomaly. Stop it! Stop it! Stop it! Yes, I know there are a few men who do have standards and won't stick his appendage in any vacant hole willing to accept him, but as I fore stated, I want to hear from him. Say it loud and proud like Kanye says, "...holla we want prenup, we want prenup..." I wanna hear, "we got standards! We got standards!" (lol) I think a man who refuses sex for the right reason (well, what's right to him) should be commended. The truth of the matter is that men tend not to refuse sex and will have sex with his wife, girlfriend, or whomever because he can and refuses to deny himself that physical release. Regardless of what society says and what the boys think, you are in fact more of a man for refusing sex, than for having it. Your body is equally sacred, it shouldn't be slutted out because the girl is willing, and what message are you sending to a girl who genuinely likes and wants to get with you if you're constantly selling yourself out to the lowest bidder? A discerning woman won't want you if she thinks you have no regard for yourself sexually.

On the flip side, a woman tends refuse sex for any number of reasons. Here's a few...1) Because she can. 2) I want something and you won't get it for me. 3) The longer I refuse, the increased chance he won't think less of me.

However, the irony of it is that women withold sex as often as they're willing to give it up, the only difference is that she has game and won't reveal why she witholds or has sex. But I will say that I do think the practice of witholding sex is pretty lame. For the most part a man can and will endure the witholding because he knows what it takes to win you over; some flowers, a gift, sweet talk, or any other dumb reason he's found out because he reads your disgarded magazines. Or lest it not be forgotten that he can resort to his porn stash and handle his own business!

Don't get me wrong, I'm sure there are many justifiable reasons for witholding sex, but witholding for sport is stupid and if he did the same in return, chic would be on the first phone with a dial tone with her girls claiming dude is cheating. Now, that would be some funny shit. I'd love to be the silent listener on that conversation.

I could go on and on for days on this, but it's really not worth it. There are two sides to the story and I'm merely a voyeur speaking on a practice that I find silly and amusing. While I'd admit that I have witheld sex, I can truly say I had a justifiable reason and informed him accordingly. On the occasion when I witheld for no other reason than because I could and I felt like it, my witholding backfired on me when he flipped the script and teased me all day and when I came home to make good on his talk, he said he wasn't feeling good. DAYUM! Talk about a bruised ego and backed up hormones! I never did that shit again. (lol)

Enough sex talk or the next thing you know my blog will be pulled by the FCC and I'll be explaining myself in court. So much for freedom of speech.


And she's off like a prom dress!

15 comments:

Tinee Bubbs said...

OH HELL NO!!!!!! do not refuse sex....it's all good :)

JCarter said...

tinee bubbs is funny. Refusing sex is a hard (pun intended) to do, but you made some good points. It's pretty much a matter of self respect and self worth that will determine if they can refuse sex or not. I have a few times but like I said, it's hard ;-)

zeek59 said...

It's also respect to or for the one whom you are refusing. I myself would not take advantage of someone in an impaired condition. A close friend of mine has said "someday we will just have to get totally drunk and get it on." Well, I don't want that. I want it to be right if it ever happens at all.

BlaqRayne said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
BlaqRayne said...

LMAO...This was an interesting read. I have dealt with men who respect themselves enough to wait. And I have refused at times, but only once as a test. It backfired, but not like yours. In my case, I felt bad and he reaped the benefits. It was like when people refuse to buy gas on Monday to try to hurt the owners' pockets then the stations experience record gas sales on Tuesday...LOL.

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